


Welcoming January Series - Season 1

by SmartieWrites



Series: Welcoming January [1]
Category: Harvest December (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-17
Updated: 2018-03-17
Packaged: 2019-04-01 11:44:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13997595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmartieWrites/pseuds/SmartieWrites
Summary: Josh has just had the worst break-up of his life. He comes to Tagami in hopes of some peace and quiet... Only to find a lovestruck god, a jealous ex, and siblings bonding a bit too closely.As he continues to live in Tagami, Josh realizes how much people can change, what love does to a person, and more.





	1. Welcoming January

**Author's Note:**

> I originally made and published this series entirely on Wattpad. Eventually, I gave up on it due to lost interest.
> 
> I've decided to bring it over to this archive, so sit back, relax, and enjoy.
> 
> Also! Please note this is a VERY old writing style of mine. It's pretty annoying, and the chapters are incredibly short. I hope you overlook these if giving a review. Season 2 uses my much newer and better style.

I drop my luggage at the door, and lean out to look through the window. It's snowing. The snow is falling hard, anybody could see that.

I gave myself a little chuckle. Tagami, of all places. Sakashima was well known. Why didn't they suggest that place? It was only one more train ride away.

I didn't care, that person probably knows how to use chopsticks better than I do. No use in questioning it. I pick up my luggage, and walk out the door. I immediately get hit by a snowball. Yay.

The town was nice; very quiet. Though this could be because there was a storm. I didn't care, I liked it. Better than what I had to deal with back home. At least here I'd get a break from-

"Welcome to Tagami, am I right?" A voice behind me said. I looked back. I couldn't make out every detail, but it was a tall male. He put his hand out. "I'm Masaki, nice to meet you." I shook his hand without a word.

"...Come on, buddy. The least you can do is introduce yourself." He said, with a laugh.

I wasn't laughing.

"Josh." I said. He seemed fine with just that.

"Let me take you somewhere you can wait for this storm to calm down," Then he started walking. I followed.

I read the sign on the door. _Sanae_ _._ Odd name for a cafe. I shrugged it off, and walked through the door. The place was just a burst of energy. There were a lot of people there. I saw Masaki at a table. Might as well sit with a familiar... Face? I didn't really get to see his face before. He was at a table. With who I assumed was his wife and child.

"Greetings," the woman said. "I am Yuki Towada. You've already met my husband, Masaki." She pointed at her husband. "And this," she patted the child's head. The child looked a lot like Masaki. But also a little Yuki. "Is our son, Yuuki Towada." The child seemed to be too interested in their own thoughts to introduce themselves.

Yuki had long, black hair. She also wore a red and blue kimono. Looked high quality, too.

Masaki broke the ice. "So I hear a friend of ours suggested you move to Tagami?" He asked.

"...Yeah," I said. "Somebody named..." I thought about their name. "Kouhei...?" I said, unsure.

Masaki smiled. "Sounds about right."

"Reality is merciless..." Yuuki finally said something. He looked around, suddenly realizing he must've talked out loud. "...Um..." It was obvious he didn't know how to counter it.

Yuki just rolled her eyes, though. "Just like your dad," she said. Yuuki's quote didn't affect her the slightest bit. Reality is merciless... I'll have to remember those words.

"We have another friend coming soon to help you get used to Tagami," Masaki said. "She should be here soon."

Yuuki turned bright red. The door to _Sanae_ opened. Yuuki looked like he wanted to hide. A woman with white hair strolled in, her daughter not trailing far behind. Everybody in the cafe cleared a path for her. Japanese customs are confusing.

I wasn't paying much attention. I looked around at the people, who all seemed to have great respect for this one woman. But then,

"Hello," she said. "I am Shiro Tagami." I looked at her, the polite thing to do. And then instantly, I wanted to hide, too. "I am the god of Tagami."

\-----------

Shiro's daughter seemed pretty happy to see Yuuki. She waved and said, "Hi Yuuki!" Like they were friends. I'm sure they were.

"Not very talkative, are you?" Shiro asked. She had this smirk on her face. Her face. Her hair. Her presence. Everything about this woman made me want to blush. To run away again. My mind was saying, 'Get the hell out of there!' But my heart insisted I stay. Reality... Was indeed merciless. "Good, that'll make my tour a lot easier." She smiled, showing her teeth. _Fangs. She had fangs. Wait... Fangs? She had fangs?_

The wind outside stopped howling, stopped threatening to burst open the door and break it's locks.

"We should get going now," Shiro continued. "Before the storm kicks up again." I simply nodded, then stood up.

I walked out with Shiro. She told her daughter to stay with Masaki and Yuki until the tour was over. Yuuki looked like he wanted to die. Reality decided to be extra merciless on him.

\------------------------------------------

I walked around with Shiro. I looked at everything in the town. Shiro was explaining it all, but I didn't listen. But then, I did hear one thing. "And that's where the school sets up their bonfires," Shiro said. "It's also where Masaki.." She seemed at a loss for words. "Where... Masaki..." Silence. She moved on, like nothing happened. "And over here, we have the school's boxing ring, you can guess what they do there..."

We continued on with the tour. A woman with a blue streak in her hair nearly ran me over. "AO!" Shiro shouted at the girl. AO didn't look back. Won't lie, Ao's scooter was very loud. No wonder she didn't hear Shiro. "Sorry about that," Shiro apologized.

What did she have to apologise for?

"That's my other... 'quirky' daughter." Shiro said. So that's what the apology was for. Shiro looked back at the bonfire grounds.

"You okay?" I asked. _I just spoke without meaning to. What's... Going on here...?_

Shiro looked sad. "Yeah..." She said. Silence. Then she stood up straight, and said to me with a smile, "I'm fine!" I didn't believe her. Not one bit.

************************

The tour took longer than expected, according to Shiro. What was meant to take a couple of hours took the whole day. Shiro walked me home.

My luggage was already inside. I'd have to thank Masaki later.

"Welp," Shiro said. "I hope you have a nice stay in Tagami." She smiled, revealing her fangs again. I wanted to tell her that I wanted to see her again. To ask her if this is the last I would ever see if her. But this time, my brain got the better of me.

"Thank you," I replied. Then she left. I went inside, closed the doors, and slumped onto my bed. I was a hopeless case.

A god. I fell in love with a god. Of all creatures. A god. She looked human, but she wasn't. A god. A god.

"A god..." I said out loud. "Why did it have to be a god?"

\------

I was laying down, I could feel the snow piling on top of me. How I got here, I have no idea. But I did know one thing. I had to get out. Fast. The snow was going to bury me alive soon. I dug my way out of the snow.

Trees. That's all I saw at first. Then I looked behind me. There was a figure, standing in the distance. I ran. Right towards the figure. My mind had to know what it was. Then I got closer. I could make out a tan jacket. Closer. It's not a jacket, it's something else... Closer. White hair. Oh no. Where had I seen those characteristics before...?

"Shiro..." I said. Sure enough, it was her. She looked like something terrible just happened. Then she hugged me, crying on me. What? What was going on?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
I woke up in my bed, hugging the air. I sighed. Hopeless case. It was all a dream.  
\-----------------------------------  
The next day, when I stepped outside, there was a wolf on my front steps. Made me jump a little.

" _I'm not here to hurt you._ " The wolf said. You heard me. _**Said.**_

"Who are you? Why are you on my house steps?" I wanted to get the important answers first.

" _Those are not important._ " Go to heck.

" _I stayed here all night to make sure you weren't the... Aggressive type. You aren't, but I did find something else._ " The wolf smiled.

I sat down next to the wolf on the steps. I wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. "And that is...?" I asked.

" _How often do you think Shiro falls in love with a human?_ "

"How did you-?"

" _Dreams are a wonderful thing. But they can also be your enemy._ "

I stood up, looking at the wolf. "You have no reason to poke through my dreams!" I said. The wolf laughed to itself.

" _And do you have a reason for your problem?_ "

"Of course, Shiro is-"

" _I'm not talking about Shiro._ "

That wolf should go to hell. I walked away, wanting to get away from that... Thing. It was not a wolf. But it looked like one. It wasn't a god, definitely didn't give off that vibe. What was it?

And why can't I live a normal life?

=========================  
Masaki invited me and his other friends for Lunch. At the Towada estate. Great, I'm gonna get a lesson about this family I keep hearing about. The "most powerful" family in Tagami.

I showed up early, to get the lecture out of the way. Actually didn't take long. I had some time. I got kinda curious. I started walking around.

Eventually I found myself in Masaki's study. There were a few books on his desk, all with a title and a month.

"Harvest December"  
"Lovely March"  
"Disunion in October"  
"Parting November"

I'd have to read them one day. "You can take them, if you want." Masaki said to me.

"Really...?" I was actually shocked.

"Sure, I've got copies and copies of them."

"...Thanks." From Harvest to Perfect, I stuffed the books in my bag. Then everybody started showing up.

First Sanae, the cafe owner. "Hello-." She talked in an unfamiliar way.

Then Mizohou. Or Mizouho. I never bothered learning how to spell her name. Sue me. She seemed energetic. "Touyama Meal Squad is a go!"

Then Ao, and Kouhei was coming late. No Shiro.

I looked at the books. Harvest December. Let's start there.

Masaki sure had a hell of a first day in Tagami, too. Somebody demanded him to be their husband, and their name is- just as I was about to turn the page, Kouhei shows up. Everybody's here. But no Shiro.

"Everybody is here," is what Yuki and Masaki said. I wanted to ask about Shiro, but decided it was probably better not to...

***************************  
"I see." Shiro said. She was talking to Shirou, her wolf. "So that boy has a crush on me."

" _No doubt about it,_ " Shirou said.

"You know, it really isn't your business poking into other's dreams." Even Shiro was annoyed at her wolf's actions. Shirou simply chuckled. Shiro sighed. "Well, where is he now?"

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

We had a good meal, and we shared a few laughs. Mashiro, current head of the Towada estate, asked me what brought me to Tagami. She was asking why I moved. I didn't have anything to say. If I did, I would be welling tears. I wasn't going to talk to anybody about what happened there.

"I just wanted to take an interest in Japanese culture."  
#########################  
On my way home, I continued reading Harvest December. Shiro. It was Shiro... Shiro? It was Shiro? That didn't sound like Shiro. Maybe she's changed since then, who knows.

Then there was Yuki. Sounded like a pretty accurate representation. She still has that naginata, I saw it in the corner of the kitchen. But she still use it to punish Masaki? I didn't really care.

Shiro and Yuki both asked Masaki to date them, and Masaki said yes to both of them. Well known recipe for fresh disaster.

Just as I was about to go inside, I saw two pairs of golden eyes slip away into the forest. Who was...?

\-------

I put down Harvest December, after a couple weeks, I finally finished it. I also met the two gods of Sakashima, along with a squirrel... Who was a human... I've stopped questioning things.

I searched through my bag and found the next book. "Boundaries in January." I'll give it a go.

\------------------------------

"Ta-da!" Mayoi held out a chopstick gun with plastic casing.

"I'm serious, you should be looking into the toy making profession. Doesn't pay much anymore, but still." I said.

"IT'S NOT A TOY!" Mayoi yelled. Then she calmed herself down. "This is the _Rune-Riter 2.0_!" I'll admit it, this was the best name for one of her inventions so far.

I looked around us. In addition to me and Mayoi... Madoi, Kusumi, and Fuyu were here. (Fuyu was what Shiro's daughter's name was.) Mayoi and Madoi were going to teach Fuyu how to be a god. Why didn't Shiro do it? Apparently she had some business to attend to. Why was I there? I had nothing better to do.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Shiro watched through the trees. Fuyu was catching on quickly, but that wasn't what Shiro came for. She was watching that boy. The one who fell in love with her. He occasionally looked up from his book to see the training, then looked back down again.

Kusumi tried to convince him to pay attention, but that boy just kept reading. Kusumi eventually walked away, muttering something about "males and their books".

_Is he right for me?_

**********************

After a few hours, the training ended. Everybody was walking away. I was packing up my stuff when suddenly...

I could hear rustling. I looked around, there weren't that many trees around. And wasn't windy anyways. _Oh well._ I thought. I just shrugged it off, then started walking home.

############

Shiro didn't get home before Fuyu. "I thought you'd said you'd be home 'in a couple of hours'." The training was longer than a couple of hours. Shiro was an hour late, though her daughter just arrived five minutes ago.

"Where were you?"

"That's none of your business," Shiro said.

Fuyu eyes met her mother's. "You were spying on that boy again, weren't you?"

"Dammit." Shiro said.

\----------------------

I put the book down. It was shorter than Harvest December. But I learned a lot about gods and boundaries.

I turned off the light, and went to bed.

\-----

Next week. I put it on my calendar. That's when Masaki and Yuki were going to need help with the Valentine's Festival. It's something new in Tagami, just started last year.

But this year, Mashiro Towada and her husband left it up to Yuki and Masaki. They _were_ going to inherit the Towada estate one day. And with that, would be helping out plan stuff for all of Tagami.

I walked outside, I gained a liking for reading outside. "Gifting February..."

" _Nice name for a book. I'm guessing you didn't write it?_ "

I jumped a little. It's that wolf again. I simply stared it down. "What do you want?" I asked.

" _Relax, Shiro just wants to know when the festival planning starts._ "

"Next week, Tuesday, to be exact." I then walked off to the park.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

" _Next week, Tuesday._ " Shirou smiled to himself. " _Perfect._ "

Shirou walked home, and saw Shiro playing with Fuyu. " _Hey._ " Shirou said.

Shiro looked in the direction of the sound. "Oh, Shirou! Did you get the date?"

" _Next week. Tuesday._ "

Fuyu rolled her eyes.

******************

Most people wouldn't go to the park during winter. I, however, happened to like the cold. It was perfect.

I got a good part of the book done. Eventually, though, I got hungry. I walked back home, which wasn't very far away. I made myself some lunch.

"You can't keep coming back here, you know." I said to Yuuki, who was curled up on my couch.

"Reality is merciless..." Was all he said.

I couldn't kick him out now. I sighed. I let him stay a while.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Shiro looked through the window. There was Yuuki, who was sleeping on the couch, and then there was Josh. The boy.

Shiro stayed there for quite some time, before finally leaving.

"Next week, Tuesday." She repeated this to herself.

\-----

I arrived at the estate around 1:20 PM. Kouhei and Sanae were already there. One by one, everybody started coming in.

"Is that everyone?" Masaki asked, as Ao walked in.

"I think so." Kouhei said.

"Great, then we can get started." Masaki laid out the blueprints on the table. Each one was for a different float. Back in America, we had people walking in parades. That made me think. I've never been to a parade with floats before. Huh.

I didn't mention that Shiro wasn't there.

I was put on money handling duty, along with Madoi, Mizouho, and somebody named 'Moyori Uesigi'. Moyori seemed pretty good at handling money. Or at least I was told. Mizouho looked like she wanted to pass out.

Yuki, Masaki, and Yuuki were in charge of keeping the festival running smoothly; Sanae, Kouhei, and Ao were in charge of floats; Mayoi, Kusumi, and Masaki's dad were in charge of building the floats.

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

Shiro opened the door. "Sorry I'm late," she immediately said.

"Doesn't matter, we were just getting started." Yuki said.

Shiro took a seat. Masaki started explaining how the entire festival would go...

*********************

After several hours, Mashiro offered us dinner. I was going to decline, but everybody else agreed to it. I didn't even open my mouth.

I took a seat, and Shiro sat right right across from me. She had this look in her eyes, like she was planning something. It made me uncomfortable.

I was probably just overthinking things; it was one of my bad habits. I started eating the food placed before me.

They all said something right before they ate. How to write it, I still don't know.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I looked at the clock. It was 8:57. Was it really that late?

"We're glad to have you here, Josh." Masaki said. Yuuki was next to him, trying to avoid contact with Fuyu.

"Glad to be here," I said.

Shiro finished her current plate. "Speaking of Josh," she said.

I looked her way. Her troublesome look got worse. _You better not be doing what I think you're doing._

Why didn't she tell me personally? Simple. Gods liked entertainment. And if she told me, without a crowd around, it wouldn't be entertaining.

Shiro put her elbows on the table, and her fists together, then rested her chin on her knuckles. She was looking right at me.

"I hear you have a crush on me,"

The room went dead silent. Everybody except me and Shiro sat frozen with the same expression on their faces.

I wanted to run. To hide. But I couldn't. Not this time.

_Reality is merciless..._


	2. Restless February

I woke up in a daze.

"I'll admit it, I've never seen somebody pass out at just the right moment." Masaki was in my room, probably making sure I wasn't dead.

I gave a weak chuckle.

Out of all the people in Tagami... Why her? Why Shiro? What was so special about her, other than she was a god?

"You're crazy." Masaki told me.

"Your point?"

"It took you less than a month to fall in love with her."

"Again... Your point?"

"That doesn't usually happen you know."

I waved "Harvest December" in his face. He got the message.

"What I mean is, it's not usually the guy who falls in love on first sight,"

_It's so much more than that. I can feel it._

"Shiro said she's giving you until the end of February to think about it."

Yay.

"And I've got a few things to say."

My anxiety goes to extreme levels. The end of February. Less than 27 days away.

"Hey, you listening?"

"I am now."

"Shiro's been through a lot, you'd better really think about your choice," Masaki explained. "A simple 'no' won't hurt as much as 'yes' followed by a 'no'."

I nervously chuckled. This wasn't good. I left America to escape drama, not end up in some more.

"End of the month," Masaki said, then walked away.

_Reality. Is. Merciless._

\-----

I finally finished "Gifting February". Now, I moved on to "Lovely March". It's good, so far.

I look up at the sky at the park. Reality. Merciless. And impossible to escape from.

I just wanted to rest, I didn't think all this anxiety was good for me. I put my bag up on the bench. And then I put my head on it. Finally, some peace and-

"Whatcha reading?" Nevermind.

"Shiro, not right now..."

"C'mon, you're the one with a crush on me!" She smiled, showing her fangs again. "You should be happy to see me!"

"I'd also be happy if I had some peace and -" Shiro takes the bag right from under my head. My head hits the bench. I sighed, then sat up.

She looked at me, with my bag in her hand, and her other hand on her hip. She had those troublesome eyes again. I rolled my eyes, then patted the empty spot next to me.

She smiled, then sat down next to me, giving me my bag back. The few people that were in the park were looking at us like we were a couple. Were we? _No, no not yet._

"You know, when I first heard the news, I didn't believe it," Shiro said. "After all, I'm usually the one falling at first sight."

Hm. I replied back. I was too busy reading to hear what Shiro was saying.

"Lemme see that!" She eventually said, and took the book from my hands. "Huh." She said. "I never knew Masaki was a writer."

Harvest December Shiro was returning.

Was it a good thing? A bad thing? I had yet to figure it out.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

I read through the book, I knew Ao had a past with Masaki, but she never said this much. I'd have to talk to her about it later, after I'm done here.

I looked at the boy next to me. He was looking up at the sky. He had a crush on me. Right? Well, he sure as hell isn't acting like it.

I hide my anger, and happily give him his book back. "Welp," I said. "I better get going." I smiled, then walked away.

*********************

She was angry. I could tell. But so was I. I moved to Tagami to get some peace, to get away from all the stress. Now, I was just stirring up more.

"She has a thing for you, huh?" Behind me, Yuuki Towada was leaning on the back of the bench.

"No kidding," I replied back.

Fuyu came running over. "Yuuki! There you are! And you're with- oh!" She seemed surprised by my presence. "You're the boy my mom keeps talking about, right?"

Is this what Masaki felt like? No, no. It was probably worse. He added Yuki to the equation. Right now, I'm just stuck on the Shiro variable.

"Are you dating her?" Fuyu asked, more interested in these questions than she was with Yuuki.

"No," I said. Fuyu looked hurt. "No, not yet." This cheered up Fuyu a little.

I had less than 26 days to figure out if it was the truth or not.

"Not yet."

Would it turn to yes?  
Or turn to...

\-----

I took a walk up to the library, and people seemed to be gossiping around me. My, that spread quick. I sighed. I finally arrived at the library.

I walked in, and the same thing that was going on outside was going on inside. I looked at my phone. February 8th. Less than 20 days. I found the section I was looking for. I grabbed a few books, and checked them out.

Upon the librarian seeing what books I had, he said, "What? Trying to read up on the history of your future wife?" Then he laughed. He stopped, though, and checked out my books.

I looked at the books in my hands as I was walking out.  
'A (Not-So) Short History Of Tagami'  
'The Land Gods'  
'Mountainous - The Legend Of Shiro'

============================

Fuyu was in the ready position, ready to tackle anything that came in her way. She had been considered a god for only 2 short years now, and she was going to show that it payed off. She charged. Then fell flat on the snow, and had a foot keep her from getting up.

"Is that the best you've got?" Fuyu's mother sounded disappointed. Shiro was pretty easy to impress, so this made Fuyu realize how terrible Fuyu is at battling. Shiro lifted her foot, and Fuyu got up.

"So," Fuyu said. "20 more days, huh?"

"20 more days," Shiro said, with a smile. "And then I'll get my answer."

Shiro stood up on the rock she was sitting on. _The way she looks at the sun, with that gleam in her eyes..._ Fuyu realized this was one of the rare occasions Shiro actually looked like a god.

"But no matter what he says," Shiro pointed towards the sun, a breeze making her look even more god-like. "I won't change! Not this time!"

Shiro and Fuyu both knew it was an empty promise, but Shiro said it anyways. And Fuyu didn't say anything about it.

****************************

Me and Yuki sat down. Yuuki was doing homework in his room.

"So what do you think?" I asked.

"Hm?" Yuki asked back. "About what?"

"Josh and Shiro, of course," After all, it's all anybody was talking about anymore. Tagami is a small town, so there's never a lot of news. Everybody tries to make the latest trend stay trending so they don't have to go through that period of time again where there was no news.

Yuki had her eyes closed, but smiled. "I think they're a hopeless case, that's what,"

"Ouch, you know, that hurts coming from the princess of Towada."

We looked. It was Josh.

"I didn't mean it like that," Yuki said, annoyed.

Josh smiled. "Geez, even now you still can't take a joke."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You tell me." Then he walked out.

"Like I said," Yuki continued. "Hopeless case."

\-----

The snow fell slowly, and the moon lit up the night. Everything was peaceful. I took a seat under a tree. I looked around. I was the only one there.

I closed my eyes, finally some peace and quiet...

And then I felt somebody slide their hand into mine. I didn't even need to look. Instead, I looked up. At the sky.

Then we looked at each other. We were both happy here. There was no reason for us to move. So we stayed there.

She accidentally sniffed in a snowflake, and then did a little sneeze. It was cute.

And then daylight woke me up. Another dream. Was it a dream? I could feel my hand grabbing onto something. I looked next to me. Shiro had snuck in during the night. She was holding onto my hand for dear life. I decided not to wake her up. I wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

********************************

"You only have 1 more week, you know." Ao said matter-of-factly.

"Your point?" I asked.

Ao sighed. "I hope you have an answer ready."

I _do_ , but I'm not ready. Not yet.

But with only 7 days left, I had to get ready. 7 days. Reality™, now with less mercy!

When it came to figuring out what kind of person Shiro is, Ao immediately popped into my mind. After all, Ao lived with Shiro her entire childhood, right?

Ao still couldn't believe her mother was falling for another human.

"It's crazy," Ao would say. "But hey, I'm not much better. Look at my 'streak'..." I didn't want to know what the streak was.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Shiro continued to look at her hand throughout the day. Shiro already knew what Josh's answer was by now, but she needed the satisfaction of hearing it.

He didn't let go.

Shiro still couldn't believe it.

She woke up with the same hand she went to sleep with in her hands. But he didn't let go. No further questions needed.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

5 days. I had 5 days left.

\-----

"What?" I asked, a bit surprised.

"You heard me," Shiro said. She left her arm outstretched.

I take her hand, and she hoists me onto Shirou.

" _So we meet again._ "

Shut up.

"Now," Shiro said. "Let's go, Shirou!" And Shiro pointed in front of her, as if to signal which direction to go in.

Shirou was fast. We were running through Tagami, then Sakashima. Then back to Tagami.

Shiro looked back at me. We both smiled. Then Shirou made a sudden stop. As if recoil, we were launched into the air. First she landed. Then I landed. On top of her. I went to get up, then we realized what situation we looked like we were in.

"I should've expected nothing less; a male taking the innocence of a female before they even start dating." Kusumi commented.

Masaki countered with, "Still got that bald spot?" That sent Kusumi running.

I got up, then helped Shiro get up. "What's going on?" I asked.

"We could be asking you the same question." Kouhei replied.

"Touche."

Yuki rolled her eyeballs at the delay. "We've lost Yuuki and Fuyu."

Shit.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°  
"Where are we going?" Fuyu asked.

"I don't know." I replied.

"What are we gonna do?"

"I don't know."

"Why did we leave?"

"Why not?"

We continued walking. I've lost direction, but as long as I had Fuyu, I was fine. Reality. Not always merciless. Just misunderstood.

################

I had 3 days left. We better find Yuuki and Fuyu.

We all split up. There was me, Shiro, Madoi, and Ao in one group.

Yuki, Masaki, Mayoi, and Mizouho in the other.

Sanae, Kouhei, and Kusumi kept watch back home.

"We'll find them, right?" Shiro asked me.

"Yeah," I said. "Yeah, we'll find them."

"Madoi is scared." Madoi said, with fear in his voice.

Me and Ao sighed.

***************************

We split up again. When we hit a spot that had 4 different paths, excluding the part we came through.

I was walking through the path I chose, and started looking up. The amount of trees was getting heavier. It made me think- hope, more like it- that this would seem like an ideal place for a child to run off to.

I sighed, then looked down at the ground. It was obvious Winter was ending. The snow was thinning. I started to think about what my answer was going to be.

A sound interrupted my thoughts. I went over to it, and sure enough, it was Yuuki.

"Please don't tell."

"Your parents are worried sick."

"Good, they never got off my back."

"Shiro is crying because she has no idea where Fuyu is."

"We were going to come back."

"When?"

"I... I don't know, okay?"

I sighed. "When I said take a break, I didn't mean run away."

"..."

"I won't tell Masaki or Yuki. Just get back tomorrow night."

"Thank you!"

\---------------------------------

I met Shiro, Madoi, and Ao back at the 4-way fork.

"Any luck?" Shiro asked.

"No," Ao and Madoi said.

"Yes," I said.

Shiro lit up. "Really? Where are they?"

"Yuuki just wants a break," I said. Everybody groaned. "But he promises to bring Fuyu and himself home tomorrow night."

"And why are you so sure he'll follow that?" Ao asked.

"I'm not," I said. "But I trust him."

"We better tell Yuki and Masaki."

"No," I said. "Yuuki told me to not tell his parents, just pretend like you don't know anything."

Everybody agreed.

\-----

I woke up, and Shiro was in my bed again. Tomorrow. That's when she'd ask. That's when I'd answer.

Shiro stretched, then looked at me. "Good morning," She said.

"Good morning," I said back.

I got up, then Shiro got up. "So what are you going to do today?" Shiro asked.

"I don't know," I said. "I haven't thought about it yet."

"Well then," she said. "Follow me."

"Okay," I said. Then followed her out the door.

It was a long climb to the top of Mt. Ookami. It was also cold. Shiro didn't even shiver. I guess that's to be expected.

We finally reached the shrine. Shiro looked at it, then looked at me. "You know you only have until tomorrow, right?"

I nodded.

"Just making sure." She said, smiling with her fangs showing again. "Well, let's go in." Then she walked into the shrine.

I looked at shrine. Tomorrow. I did love Shiro... But how long would that last...? _A simple no is better than a yes followed by a no._ Masaki's words echoed through my head. I breathed in, out, then walked through the temple doors.

Shiro was standing by a mirror. "C'mon," she said. Then she placed her hand on the mirror, and the mirror started glowing white.

I stood there, speechless.

"Well?" Shiro asked. "Aren't you going in?" I didn't even know I could go in.

I walked up to the mirror, looked at Shiro, then walked through the mirror.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

It was like a whole other world. As soon as I walked through, a gust of wind nearly knocked me over. Shiro walked in behind me. "C'mon," she said. "You gotta see this." Then she grabbed my arm, and almost dragged me through the snow. I was able to run and catch her pace, though.

She took me to a rock, and then sat down. She patted the spot next to her. I sat down.

"Look," she said. I looked in front of me. The sun was rising. I thought it was moving.

Shiro slipped her hand into mine, then rested her head on my shoulder. "I love you," she said.

I didn't say anything. What was I supposed to say?

***********************

_'I love you, too.' Just say it. Come on._

I looked at the sun rise. I felt comfortable, here on Josh's shoulder.

I felt comfortable. I felt safe. I felt happy. I felt... Like I was with Masaki again.

I closed my eyes. With his answer tomorrow, I would have another question for him. I've practiced asking it.

_Do you want to be a god with me?_

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

I started to wonder about reality. It was confusing, to say the least. It would be merciless one minute, then perfect, then merciless, and so on, so forth... In a way, it was like my life.

Shiro had fallen asleep on my shoulder. I looked at the sun. It was fully out now, and shining bright. I looked at Shiro. She seemed so peaceful when she was sleeping. This wasn't what a god was supposed to look like. Shiro didn't look like a god. In fact, she looked like the farthest thing from a god. She seemed like a normal, human girl. I kissed her head. No response. That meant she was asleep, but not dreaming yet.

After an hour or two, Shiro woke up. She sat up, after stretching her arms. Then she stood up, and jumped down from the rock. I repeated.

"C'mon!" She said with a smile. "Race you to the portal!" Then she took off.

"Hey!" I yelled after her, starting to run. "Give me a heads up!"

Shiro reached the portal first. No surprise. "Beat you," she said.

The rest of the day wasn't much.

Tomorrow was my last day. An answer would be expected before that day ends.

——————————

The sunlight woke me up. This morning was different. Shiro wasn't here this time. She went home, and waited for Fuyu so she could give Fuyu "a talk".

I could only imagine what Masaki and Yuki said to Yuuki.

I looked up at the sky. I got ready for the day, then ran out the door. Today was a day for the record books. Today, everything in my life was going to change.

****************************

"I honestly think you should get dressed up for this, mother." Fuyu said. "Not just wearing your normal clothes."

"Except the last time I wore that dress, a boy dumped me."

"So you consider it a bad luck charm?"

"You could call it that." I looked at myself in the mirror. Today was the day. Today was the day where my whole life would change.

And today was the day that Tagami was, hopefully, going to have a new god. It made me wonder what that would be like. Josh. With godly powers. Imagine that.

_Today's the day._

My wolf ears started to poke out. It's been a while since they've been out.

"Well Fuyu," I said. "You coming? Or are you going to stay here?"

"I'll come," Fuyu said.

I ran for the portal. And even on the other side, I ran. And ran. I couldn't wait much longer.

They already agreed on a location.

"Town square." A group of people were already there. News in Tagami meant a lot. But relationship news in Tagami? It meant the world.

I waited a few minutes, then the crowd cleared a path. There he was.

\-----

There I stood. We were right across from each other. Shiro stood there. There was a crowd around us. I could see Masaki, Yuki, Kouhei, and Sanae. Shiro was standing across from me. She had a question, and I had an answer. _This is going to change everything._

I noticed Shiro's wolf ears twitching. Wait, has she always had those...?

"Josh," she said. "I am going to ask you again. Do you love me?"

_Do you love her?_ Time seemed to pause. It's almost as if the universe gave me more time. Suddenly, the crowd was no longer there. Or at least, I couldn't see them. A snowstorm blocked my view of them. No, no. Wait. They aren't there. I'm on top of a mountain. It's just me and Shiro. There's no room for anybody else. I looked into Shiro's eyes.

_Do you love her?_  
_A simple no is better than a yes followed by a no._  
_'I love you.'_

Thoughts swirled around in my head like a whirlwind. What _was_ my answer? I've questioned it so many times. Too many times.

The universe decided I've had enough time.

"Well?" Shiro asked. "Do you like me?"

I made up my mind.

"No," I said.

Shiro looked surprised.

"I don't _like_ you. I _love_ you."

The snowstorm disappears, along with the mountain. I can hear the crowd cheering. Masaki looked at me and gave me a small nod. _You did it._

Shiro ran up and gave me a hug, nearly knocking me over. "I love you, too." She hugged tighter. I hugged back.

"I've just got one more question for you."

A murmur arose in the crowd.

"Another question?"  
"What could it be?"  
"Does she want a yayako?"

Masaki suggested the last one, and Yuki gave him a small slap to the back of his head. It still looked like it hurt.

"Ask away," I said.

"Do you want to be a god with me?"

I've never heard so many people gasp at once.

"Of course," I said.

"Really?" Shiro seemed exhilarated about this. "Well then, let's go!" She grabbed my arm and almost dragged me again.

Masaki had this face saying he knew what I was feeling all too well.

Reality wasn't merciless. It's just confusing.


	3. Powerful March

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not gonna lie, I feel this chapter (or book in the season, rather) is the worst thing I've made ever. It's never even brought up after the beginning of the next chapter.
> 
> Please, feel free to skip this. It's an unimportant chapter we could all do without.

"Ready?" Shiro asked.

"Nope," I said. "Let's do it anyways."

She held out her hand. I took it. Then she took my other hand with her other hand.

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"If you say so." Shiro closed her eyes, then looked as if she was deep in thought.

After a few minutes, Shiro declared something in a foreign language. I could feel power rushing through my veins. It was painful, but not terrible.

A blue light started to form around me and Shiro. I had to put one foot behind me to stay balanced.

Shiro breathed in. "Hah!" Then she let go, and I was sent flying into the wall. A sonic boom shot from the center of the shrine. I was sure it could be seen all over Tagami.

"Feel any different?"

"I've got a headache, does that count?"

I looked at my hands. Shiro smiled. "It worked," she said.

I knew what that meant.

"Now you're the second god of Tagami."

I was a god now.

—————

I woke up next to Shiro. I was in her house, unlike other nights.

Her ears perked up, as if she heard something. I knew she didn't, though. It was early morning. She was still asleep.

I got up, and walked into the main room. Fuyu was there.

"You're up early," I said.

"Oh," Fuyu said. "Hey." She completely forgot I was here. "I always wake up early."

"Why?"

Fuyu shrugged. "Just a habit, if you can call it that."

_I call it suspicious._

"I guess I should go back to bed...?"

"No, no. No need. It's early morning, yes, but not very early. Shiro would've woken you up in a half hour anyways."

Fuyu nodded, while taking an orange out of the fridge. Shiro's friend, Mikami, always sent oranges. I don't complain about it. Oranges happen to be my favorite fruit.

I looked around the house. It's hard to believe (yet very easy to believe at the same time), that this is where Shiro gave birth to Fuyu. And also where Masaki proposed to Yuki.

"So," Fuyu said. "Why'd you sleep here last night?"

"Your mother's my girlfriend, no other reason needed."

"True, true..." Fuyu peeled the orange.

The door opened up. "'Morning, Shiro." I said.

"Good morning," she said with a smile. She was always so energetic in the mornings.

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

I taught him the basics of being a god that day.

The simple stuff. Like battling and boundaries.

Afterwards, we went back to Tagami.

It'd been a full day since we were last there. Everybody greeted us.

"So what?" Masaki asked. "Do I call you Josh-sama?"

"Please, just stick to Josh..."

"Fair enough."

After we were done talking to Masaki, I told Josh, "You're gonna have to get used to people calling you Josh-sama. After all, you _are_ a god now."

"Yeah, I know, I know," he said. "But it feels weird having my friends calling me by a God's name."

Fair enough.

==========================

Fuyu lowered herself to almost touching the ground. She lost last time, but she wasn't going to give up. She needed to show people she wasn't a defenseless snowflake~ she was a storm.

Fuyu ran towards her target, the target deflected an attack, but so did Fuyu.

Fuyu jumped up, threw a punch, and missed. The problem is, her target deflected the punch with so much accuracy that Fuyu was sent flying into a snowbank.

"You've gotten better," Shiro said, helping Fuyu to her feet.

"This time I actually dodged your attack- er, your first attack."

"Now you just have to learn how to land on your feet."

"At high speeds like that?!?"

"If you don't learn, you'll lose any battle you go into."

Fuyu couldn't deny this. "Okay, when should we start?"

"Now!" Shiro exclaimed. A gust of wind sent Fuyu off her feet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A staff. A wooden one nonetheless. Seemed like a perfect starters weapon.

"The staff may look easy at first, but is actually a lot harder than it seems." Shiro said.

Great.

Shiro taught me the correct way to hold a staff, how to attack with it, defend with it, and counterattack with it. It's amazing what you could do with a miniature log.

After the training, Shiro decided we should go out for dinner, Fuyu would be fine on her own.

It wasn't anything fancy, which actually, is good for me. I still have no idea how to use chopsticks, and the only fancy restaurant in Tagami is mainly chopstick food.

I opened the door to _Sanae_ , and left it open for Shiro. She walked through, then I sat down with her.

Sanae came over to take our orders. She seemed delighted to see us. "Well if it isn't the _two_ gods of Tagami-!"

Sanae took our orders, then we waited for our food.

"You know," Shiro said. "When we get back home, Fuyu is probably gonna be asleep."

I was about to ask, _What's your point?_ But then she gave me the "eyes", as I called the look with the troublesome eyes, and no questions were needed.

*******************************

Yuki looked back to me. "Hopeless cases," she said.

"I wouldn't be so sure about that, Yuki." I said. "I mean, look at them. Don't they look perfect together?"

Yuki couldn't object to this. "You have a point," she said.

"Masaki Towada always has a point." (Though sometimes it's dull).

Yuki went back to eating her food. "So what do you think we should do about Yuuki?" She asked.

"Beats me," I said. "If what he said was true, then I think we should just give him some space."

"You can't believe everything a child says."

"But you also can't believe everything that comes out of their mouth is a lie."

*******************************

After we finished our food, it was still the evening. It wasn't technically night. "Fuyu told me you consider your current 'fancy' dress a bad luck charm."

Shiro nodded.

"Then let's go get you a new dress."

Shiro thought about it for a moment, then agreed. We headed for the dress shop.

There was a lot of "How does this look?"s and "What about this one?"s. Afterwards, Shiro finally decided on a couple dresses she liked. I looked up to the sky. It was night now, pretty late, too.

Shiro noticed this, too. "C'mon!" She said. "Let's get home!" I grabbed her hand, and ran with her.

After we got home, Shiro went to check on Fuyu. "Yep," she whispered. "Fuyu is asleep." I hung up the new dresses in the closet. Then Shiro grabbed my hand, and pulled me into the bedroom.

—————

"Two gods, huh?"

"Yessir."

I got up. "And the first one is training the second one?"

"Also her own daughter."

"We're taking a trip to Tagami, then."

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

"Left!" I hit the attack coming from the left. "Right! Up!" I detached the two staff pieces, and blocked both attacks at once.

 _Whack_! Another staff hits me from behind. I should've expected as much.

"Expect the unexpected," Shiro told me. We both sat down.

"So expect everything?" I asked.

"Yep!" She said, smiling.

"That's impossible."

"Nothing's impossible."

"It's like telling somebody they need 3 hands."

"Or like telling somebody they need to sharpen their-"

I blocked the attack that time.

"-reflexes, it's hard, but not impossible. It just takes some train-"

I grabbed the staff that time.

"-ing, like everything else in the world."

Shiro took her staff back. "Now if only you could counter that good in battle."

I shrugged. "I'll try." I hugged her, looking at the view of the sun.

\------------

Somebody was at my window. I already knew who. I opened the window. "Fuyu," I said. "Stop throwing rocks at my window."

"I read a book about a guy who threw rocks at a window to get a girl's attention." She said.

She looked like she really wanted to see me. I sighed. "Come on in," I said. She climbed through the window.

Father came into my room. "Yuuki, make sure to-" he was cut off at the sight of Fuyu. "How did she, you know what, nevermind." He closed the door.

Fuyu gave a weak smile. "You know," she said. "You're lucky you have a dad. Mom doesn't even remember mine..."

I looked at Fuyu. It looked like she was about to cry. I hugged her, reassuring her. "And here I thought you didn't love me," she said.

"I don't," I said. "But I can't let you cry like that."

"Oh," she said. "Yeah."

I felt bad friendzoning Fuyu, but I really don't love her. I enjoy her company, and I like being around her, but something is always telling me that loving Fuyu...

...Would be weird.

"Reality is merciless..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Oh hey," Shiro said. "You're back. Where were you?"

"I saw Fuyu leaving," I said. "I wanted to make sure she wasn't getting into any trouble"

"Mm." She said.

"She didn't, but I did see something else."

"Well, tell me! I wanna hear this."

"I think Fuyu has a crush."

"Really?" Shiro looked excited. "On who?"

"Yuuki."

And then Shiro's smile faded away. "On... Yuuki?"

I nodded.

"No... No this isn't good!"

"Why not?"

Shiro looked worried. "Okay, so you know Yuuki's father, right?"

"Masaki, yeah."

"Well," she breathed in. "Masaki is also Fuyu's father."

I was genuinely confused. "So wait, did Masaki-?"

"No," she stopped me, then got into this really long story about a ritual, and it's unintended side effects, and I was just...

"Woah." I said. That's all I _could_ say.

"So we need to stop Fuyu and Yuuki from getting together." Shiro's ears twitched. "And to put the cherry on top, we have another problem. A foreign god I've never sensed before just stepped inside the Tagami boundaries."

"So...?"

"And I can sense his power. It's strong."

—————

"Well, isn't that something." I said. The god that Shiro had never sensed before was already giving off a bad vibe. Maybe it was the look on his face, or maybe it was from the visible dark aurora around him.

"I don't think I can beat him alone," Shiro said. I was about to say _I'm a_ _god_ _, too._ But then remembered; I still haven't even mastered a staff.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

"Oh no," Fuyu said.

"What?" I asked. She pointed out in the distance. There was a person who seemed to be floating, moving _slowly_ into Tagami. If that didn't mean trouble, I don't know what trouble is anymore.

I was worried, but tried to assure myself. "It's okay, Shiro and Josh got this."

Fuyu looked at me as if to say, _Not this time._ Gulp.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"So what are we supposed to do?" Shiro asked. "We can't just go head-on."

"But there's also no chance of surprising him..."

Shiro looked worried. "This is really bad, I-I didn't prepare for this!"

"Hey," I said, then took her hand. "Let's just calm down, and think."

"You're right..." She took my other hand. "Thanks, so now-"

Then a bright light started swirling around us. Light emitted from my hands, and Shiro's.

"What's going on?" I asked.

"I don't know!" Shiro said. "Just keep holding on!"

We wouldn't let go of each other's hands. Maybe it was that survival instinct where when prey is in danger, it freezes up on the spot. Or maybe we knew that this had something to do with us holding on to each other.

And then the light disappeared. We were still holding hands. I could feel the power in my bloodstream. And from Shiro's determined look, it could only mean one thing.

We had more power than ever. Maybe... Just maybe... We could fight this thing. We weren't going to let it win.

"Come on," she said. "Let's go."

We walked up to the unsensed god, with my right hand in Shiro's left hand.

He simply didn't care. "Aw, how cute," he said. "A couple of gods, both unprepared, thinking they can beat me." He looked threatening. But me and Shiro held our ground.

"Well, fine then," he said. "I'll start with you two, first."

**************************

Me and Fuyu looked out the window, the god had lowered himself to the ground. Fuyu and I both knew something bad was about to happen.

But Josh and Shiro didn't move.

It actually scared me. I could tell Fuyu was scared, too. I wanted to reassure her, but even I couldn't reassure myself.

The god's hands started glowing, then a beam of light engulfed the Tagami gods.

\----------------------------------------------

And that was it. Nothing more. Or maybe it was? Either way, me and Shiro stood there as if nothing happened.

"What?!?" The god screamed. "Why are you not _DEAD_?!?"

I looked at Shiro, then she looked at me. Then we looked back at him. "Leave." Me and Shiro said in unison.

"Make me."

"If you say so." Then we shot our own beam of light. It weakened him a lot.

"No... This-this shouldn't be possible. It _shouldn't_!"

"Leave."

"Fine." Then he left Tagami. Simple as that.

We stood there shocked. That just happened. We just beat a god who should've been able to destroy us. But he couldn't.

"We... Survived...?" Shiro asked.

"Yeah..." I said. "We survived." Then we hugged each other. "We survived!"

—————

"Come on," Shiro said.

"Okay," I said, then I grabbed her hand, and she directed me towards the rock. The rock where we saw the sun rise.

 _The sun rise_. These words resonated with me. That day was the first day Shiro said she loved me. It was a day I'd never forget.

We sat down, then Shiro rested her head on my shoulder.

"Look," she said. "The sun is setting."

It was. And it was beautiful.

"Yeah," I said. "It is, isn't it?" I gave myself a little chuckle.

We sat there, watching the sun set over the melting snow.

"Josh,"

"Yeah?"

Then she looked up at me. "I want a yayako."

Woah. I was curious, so I asked, "Don't you already have children?"

"I do, and I love them both, but..." She looked back at the sunset, blushing. Then back at me, smiling. "I want one with you."

"Hm." I replied, I was trying to think. I thought about what it would be like, to have a family with Shiro. I thought about it over and over. After all, this wasn't just something you can jump into. A family was a serious thing. I continued to ponder and wander through my thoughts.

"Sure," I said. Shiro gave a big smile, then kissed me on the cheek. I looked at the sun. "Just go to sleep,"

"Okay," she said. Then she laid on her side, and put her head back on my shoulder, and closed her eyes.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

I was lost in my thoughts. So lost, that I also lost track of time. Before I knew it, the sun had completely set, and the moon was out. Shiro was fast asleep.  
I picked her up, and walked home.

A yayako.

A family.

A commitment.

A true sign of love.

A baby.


	4. Wonders In April

"What happened?" Yuki asked.

"You mean in March?" I asked.

"Yeah."

"I don't know, either." Which was a lie, I knew exactly what happened. Two flashes of light illuminated Tagami near the end of March. It wasn't anything supernatural; it was simply a battle between gods. If you could even call it that.

Masaki put one hand behind his head. "It's so weird," he said. "Nobody knows."

It never occurred to me until now that Masaki never uses his right hand. Or his right arm, for that matter. It's just always... There. By his side. It was actually kind of creepy.

But I didn't question it; I'm sure there was a reason, and that's all I needed to know.

Everything had a reason, right? Right. Whether it was believable or not; it was still a reason.

But... Something was starting to bother my mind.

_I want a_ _yayako_ _... With you._

Ever since Shiro said that, something was always on my mind. But... Was it too early?

Masaki must've noticed something was troubling my mind, he gave me the signal to slow down, so I did. Shiro and Yuki continued walking at their own paces. Talking about what? I do not know.

"What's going on?" Masaki asked.

"Nothing," I replied.

"You're a terrible liar."

"Thanks, I get it from my mom." Then I sighed. "Shiro said she wanted a yayako."

"That doesn't sound so-"

"I'm not done yet. After that, I started thinking over and over about this..."

Masaki seemed to be interested. "And that is...?"

"Masaki..." Then I blushed. "I think I want to marry Shiro."

Masaki covered his mouth. Then he said, "Jeez, you like doing things early, huh?"

I guess it was in my nature. I fell in love with Shiro the first day I met her, two months later, I'm wanting to marry her. It was early. But...

Was it too early?

—————

"I'm just saying," I said. "If Fuyu is going to be like you, and show up in public in Tagami, she should get some schooling."

"Why?" Shiro asked. "I've been teaching her here, and she's fine."

"If you say so." I said, then plopped an orange wedge in my mouth.

I accidentally hit my foot on my bag. I haven't read the books in a while. I look through my bag. Where did I leave off? Oh right, _Typhoon in April_.

Shiro had already read some of this, so it came to no surprise to me when Ao showed up in the book. But still.

Shiro sent Fuyu outside, then walked over to the bedroom. "Well?" She asked.

"Well what?" I asked.

Then she smiled, showing her fangs again. "You agreed to having a yayako."

Oh, right. "Coming." I said.

It didn't seem too early for a baby, so why wait for a marriage? _Because they're two different things._ I told myself.

\----------------------------------------

"So how's your day so far?" Yuuki asked.

I stretched my arms. "Fine," I said. We were walking around Tagami. Just me and him. It felt nice. "How's yours?"

"Crazy," he replied.

"So... Same as always?"

"Same as always."

I inched closer to him. Just being around him is nice, whether it be in a crowd, or just the two of us. Though sometimes, it felt weird. I've never known why. But I also don't care. My love is always blinding that feeling. I just wished Yuuki felt the same way.

Did he? I don't know. He hides his feelings well. Except for when he says...

"Reality is merciless." He said, then looked up at the sky.

 _Reality is merciless_. That's when I knew something was going on inside his mind. "What's going on?" I asked.

He shrugged it off. "Nothing. Nothing at all."

He was a terrible liar.

\-------------------------------------------

"There they are again. Together." I said.

"What's so bad about that-?" Sanae asked. "It's good that they're getting along-. Most siblings fight-."

"What do you think would happen if two siblings met, but they didn't know they were siblings?" Yuki asked.

"Well, I imagine they would have a natural urge to love each oth-... Ohhhhhh-." Sanae finally realized why Fuyu and Yuuki being together was weird to me and Yuki.

"Yikes." Kouhei said. "That does not sound good."

"It's hard to tell if Yuuki likes her or not, but Fuyu definitely likes Yuuki." I said. "Yuuki's good at hiding emotions. Fuyu... Not so much."

"So what does that mean?" Mizouho asked.

Me and Yuki said at the same time,

"We have to do all we can to keep them just friends."

\---------------------------------------

Love is confusing, amazing, and wonderful. Mostly confusing. _Marriage. And a baby. The two go together, so why is it so hard for me to figure this out?_  
_You've taken enough risks as it is; running from America, falling in love with a god on your first day in Tagami, and agreeing to a baby._  
_It's not about the risks. It's about the time._  
My mind was having a war with itself.

It does this often in stressful situations. But lately, they all end with:

 _It's still too early._  
_No, it's not too early._

And then ends there. It's never resolved. The war just keeps going on and on and on. I looked at Shiro. She was asleep.

I love Shiro, and she loves me.

 _So stop asking questions and get on with it._  
_But there's so much to think about._  
_Who cares?_  
_I care!_

Here we go again. Reality is merciless.

—————

I could feel the breeze on my face. It was enough to wake me up. The sun was out, but I still knew rain was coming. It was in the scent of the air.

After I got up, I closed my window. A morning breeze was fine, but too much of it was not. My bedroom was nice and cool. I was used to the cold; why wouldn't I be? After all, whenever I walk into Tagami, I'm on top of a mountain. The cold is natural.

Mom and Josh were still sleeping. I took my chance, and went outside. A strong wind nearly blew me away. Ever since Yuuki convinced me to run away with him (less convincing, more just... Asking.), Mom has been keeping a close eye on me when she's able to. If she's able to, but doesn't want to, she usually makes sure somebody else is watching me.

I walked through the grass. Another gust of wind, then that same weird feeling in my heart. What was so weird about being with Yuuki?

My body knew something that my mind didn't. _You two better start talking, I have no idea why being with_ _Yuuki_ _feels so..._

Unnatural, yet natural. At the same time.

———————————

I woke up to the sound of rushing rain. I looked next to me. Shiro was there, asleep. Behind her, the window was closed. Would've been bad if it was open. When I got up, I felt something on my head. I touched it.

 _Oh, right._ I reminded myself. Now that my body has fully adapted to my new powers, I had ears similar to Shiro's and Fuyu's.

 _It'll take some getting used to._ Shiro had said on the first day I noticed them. _But soon, you'll completely forget they're even there! (Maybe...)_ Shiro was unsure of the last part, and she had reason to. There's only been a handful of humans turned into permanent gods. The results weren't very... Accurate, so to speak...

What? I read up on this stuff.

After exiting the bedroom, Fuyu was up. Again. "Do you train yourself to wake up this early?" I asked.

"Maybe," Fuyu said with a smile. Shirou came running through the door, then shook the rain off his coat.

"What's up, Shirou?"

He looked at Fuyu, then me. " _She was out_."

"Fuyu, you know you're not supposed to-"

"Well, I wanted to enjoy the morning."

"Look, I'm not going to tell Shiro, just... Stop, okay?"

Fuyu hesitated, then sighed and said, "Fine."

Sooner or later, I was going to get the chance to be Fuyu's 'real' dad, once I figured out what's 'too early' or 'early, but not too early'. My head started spinning again. My mind was at warfare again.

 _Well, what do you consider too early?_  
_Depends._  
_On what?_  
_The situation._  
_Marriage._  
_The situation?_  
_I just told you._  
_Yes, but what is the current relationship like? Are they happy?_  
_Why would I be asking about marriage if they weren't?_  
_You tell me._  
_It's too early._  
_No, it's not too early._

Reality. I can't even describe it anymore.

————————————

I decided to take a risk.

"Josh?" I said.

"Yeah?" He replied.

"What do you do if you love somebody, but at the same time, it feels too weird to love that person?"

"If this is about you, then you tell me."

"What?"

"Your heart. What's it saying?"

"A lot of different things."

Then he shrugged. "Work with your mind, and get your heart back in shape. Then re-ask yourself that question." He went back to reading his book.

_Get your heart back in shape._

—————

"What!?!"

"Don't be so surprised, Ao." I said with a smile. Josh usually smiles back at me when I do it; but then I remember, this is Ao, not Josh.

"Mom, I get it but..." Ao said. "You haven't even married him yet!"

"Who says?"

"Don't tell me you actually-"

"No, I didn't. Just wanted a reaction."

Ao took a deep breath. "Fine," she finally said. "When will I be able to talk to him?"

"About what?"

"Shouldn't I get acquainted with him?"

I thought about this for a moment. Ao was, and always would be, a wild card. She could say she's doing one thing; and it could go two ways. Usually it never went in the way it was supposed to.

Aw, screw it. What's the worst that could happen? "I'll talk to him about it."

"Thank you."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ao?" He said. "What does she want to talk about?"

I shrugged. "Even I couldn't get a direct answer. Just something about being 'acquaintances'."

Josh rolled his eyes. "Alright, I'll talk to her." He himself must've figured out the wild card tactic Ao used on Masaki. Effective, but certainly trouble. For both the opponent, and the defending side. You never knew what to expect from her.

I looked at the book next to him. _Typhoon in April_. Huh.

"Well that spread quickly."

"What?" I asked. He tossed me the newspaper article, and there was a section about how the two gods of Tagami were planning on having a baby. That _did_ spread quickly.

—————————————

"So now I'm able to have an actual conversation with you." Ao said.

"Yep," I said. We were walking to some place Ao knew about. I had my suspicions, but... No, that's it. I had my suspicions. I honestly didn't believe that Ao was going to some place in Tagami that wasn't well known to _not_ cause trouble.

"I hear you plan on having a yayako with my mother."

I shrugged. "Yeah. Basically,"

Ao just nodded. I noticed she had the ears as well; though I know for a fact I've never seen her with them before. But this, again, had a reason. If a god and a normal human mated and had a child, the child would have minor physical changes from that of a normal human. And the child can control these changes around age 10...

Stop looking at me like that, check your local library. There's bound to be books on this stuff.

"So where are you from?"

"America."

"No, I mean _where_ in America?"

"New York."

"Where in New York?" _You ask a lot of questions._

"Buffalo, if you want to be specific."

"Never heard of it."

"Wouldn't blame you for not knowing it."

Ao stopped in front of a building. It looks like it's seen better days, but also looks like it's brand new. Looks can be deceiving.

"Well, c'mon." She said. "We can talk in here." I walked in, then Ao walked in.

"That's strange, nobody's here." I said. I heard a lock. I immediately grab my retractable staff, and stop Ao just as she's an arm's length away from me. I hold the staff at her neck. "What? Didn't think I'd come prepared?"

"Smart move."

"That doesn't mean much, coming from you."

"Ouch."

"What were you planning?"

Ao sighed. "Well, no use in hiding it now. I was trying to test you."

"Test me? On what?"

"Well, if you can't handle me, there's no way you're gonna be able to handle my mother."

"Oh, you'd be surprised."

"Wait, did you two already...?"

"C'mon, you should know your own mother better than I do."

She rolled her eyes. "Fair point."

I didn't lose my focus, we both knew getting into a fight would be useless. I was a full god, who was still learning to fight. Ao was an experienced fighter, but not a full god. We would've been at a stalemate. I knew once I'd lose my focus, she'd try to get the upper hand.

Finally, she said, "You're no fun." Then walked towards the door. I didn't retract my staff, but I also walked towards the door. Ao unlocked it, then walked out.

I walked out too, and walked back with Ao. She acted like nothing happened.

"So why did you leave America?" _You're fucking crazy._ I thought.

"It's a long story. Why did you stay in Tagami after Masaki..." I tried to think of a way to sugarcoat it, but I just couldn't think of a way. "...Dumped you?"

"That's a long story as well."

—————

I looked at the ring in my hand. Ao gave it to me.

_I was originally going to give it to_ _Masaki_ _, but you know how that turned out. Here, you have it. I don't need it anymore. Maybe you'll find a use for it._

It was a diamond colored blue. As blue as the ocean. Hm. This should come as no surprise. Ao was all about blue. Blue dress, blue eyes, blue streak in hair. I never knew somebody could be so devoted to a color.

It kicked up the question again.

 _Is it too early?_  
_Well..._  
_It can't be, fate wouldn't have given me this ring if otherwise._  
_Fate didn't._ _Ao_ _did._  
_You know what I mean!_  
_Your point?_  
_You're tiring. It can't be._  
_Think about it; two months. Where on Earth is that considered not early?_  
_If I knew more about the world, I could give you an accurate answer._  
_It's still too early._  
_It's not too early._

I sighed. Fuyu walked in. "Oh hey, Fuyu." Then I looked at Fuyu. "You don't look so good."

"I'm fine." She smiled. "Really. I am."

"Go lay down." I said.

"I was already planning to." Then Fuyu walked into her bedroom, and closed the door. I went back to examining the ring.

—————————————

Masaki was busy writing again. I could've sworn he was going to stop at _Perfect December_. "What are you writing?" I asked.

"Just another story," Masaki said. _Just another story. Yeah. No kidding._

"Okay... About what?"

"Gee, Yuki, you weren't this interested in my writings before."

"Try I was too busy before." I said. Masaki smiled. He thought I was joking. I wasn't.

He held up the book in his hand. _Welcoming January._ "This one's about Josh and Shiro."

"Really?"

"What? It's good writing material."

I couldn't argue with that. Even to me, it was quite the interesting story. "Well," I said. "Are you going to get his side of the story?"

"Of course, just like I did with you and Kouhei." This was all I needed to hear. I went back to making Yuuki's lunch.

——————————————

"What do you mean she doesn't look well?" I asked.

"That's what I saw, at least." Josh answered.

"No, she can't get sick. She's a full god. It shouldn't be possible."

"Hm..." Josh thought about this for a moment. "I'm assuming a god's body system is similar to a human's?"

"Well, yes and no. The immune system is much stronger, though."

"Well. There's our problem. There's something wrong with her _body_ system, not the immune system."

"I'm not following."

"The body system can just as well cause illnesses if it fails."

"Fails to what?"

"A number of things. Heal, maintain homeostasis, fight off the virus itself."

"So what do we do?"

"We wait, it seems like a common cold."

"If you say so."

—————————————

Now it felt like my body and mind were at battle. One trying to figure out the problem, the other trying to keep the answer a secret. In a way, it reminded me of human wars.

 _I'm not asking for much. Just why it seems so weird to love_ _Yuuki_ _._ I told myself.

This only seemed to make matters worse. _Achoo!_ I sneezed.

—————

"If anything, don't propose the way she 'proposed' to me." Masaki said.

"Thanks, very useful advice." I said.

"Better to be safe than sorry."

"Masaki, I really need help here. I'm stuck without a clue of what to do."

"What does your mind say?"

"A lot of fighting and swearing about what's considered too early and what's not."

Masaki was surprised. "OK... What about your heart?"

I shrugged. "It's telling me I love Shiro."

"But when it comes to marriage...?"

"No reply."

"I see... Well, I don't know. Try Dr. Manaka, she might be able to help."

"No, I'm good."

"Are you already that far in my books?"

"Yeah, you should keep writing."

"I am. In fact..." He took a notebook and pen out. "I've got a few questions."

——————————————

I walked with Shiro to the top of Mt. Ookami. My mind was going left and right.

"Wait." She said. She turned to face the town. The sun was setting. She grabbed my hand.

It would've been the perfect time.  
I had to choose.  
If I didn't do it now, when would a chance like this happen?  
My mind finally stopped fighting each other.

 _Aw, fuck it._  
_So you agree with me?_  
_Yeah, I give up._

An agreement was reached.  
_It's too early._  
_So when_ should _we ask?_  
_Hm... Summer, maybe?_  
_June? That's only 2 months away!_  
_Then what about August?_  
_August.......... Yeah, that could work._

August.

—————————————

I couldn't sleep. All I could think about was August. That's when I'd propose.

Shiro was facing the other way. I thought she was asleep, but then I saw her grasp the blanket tightly, then say "I've made up my mind!"

She turned over. She had a glitter in her eyes. I felt like she's had this look before. And what she said next confirmed my suspicions.

"You'll be my husband!"

The same thing she said to Masaki.

Well, there goes August.

—————

  
Everything was starting to ache. Mom declared something in the other room, but I couldn't tell what. I was dizzy, but that could be because I was losing sleep.

I had to get up. The ground was cold. Too cold. Too cold? The cold has never bothered me before.

I was starting to lose my mind. Whatever this illness was, it is not going away. My eyes were finally starting to close, but I didn't want that.

I wanted to stay awake.

I didn't want to dream about Yuuki again.

I didn't want my mind and body to start fighting again.


	5. Determined May

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter adds a staple cliche for relationship novels- the ex. If you don't like this cliche, feel free to skip. (Though I'd recommend not skipping this chapter, it's pretty important)

When I woke up, Shiro's face was right above mine. "Well, good morning." I said.

"Good morning." She said with a smile.

After I got dressed, and got ready for the day, Shiro said something.

"I've been meaning to ask you something," she said.

"Okay."

"Why did you leave America?"

That's a story for the yearbooks. Especially since it happened at the end of the year. Of all times.

"It's a long story," I said.

"We've got nothing else to do." Shiro said.

I took a seat next to her on the bed. "If you insist."

Then I took a deep breath. "It all started in December... 2 years ago..."

I was about to recite a story I told myself I was never going to think of again.

I met a girl. It was so... Unusual. We bumped into each other on the street one day. "I-I'm sorry, I'll help you pick that up..." I said. So I did.

"Thanks." She said. She brushed the hair from her face. It was beautiful. It made me smile. She blushed.

"Oh..." I said, after realizing I was smiling. "I just made things weird, didn't I..."

"No, it's fine." She said. "Hey, you wanna be friends?"

"Yeah. Yeah, sure."

Fast forward to January.

January was when I started feeling things, when I felt love.

Fast forward to February.

In February, we officially started dating.

It was a month I'd never forget. But not for the reason you'd think.

March.

March was when we started being together in public. Holding hands out in the street, kissing on park benches, that kind of stuff.

April.

In April she went away. But only for a month. My friends noticed I was different without her.

May.

May was when she came back. I ran up to her at the airport. We hugged in the middle of the lobby.

Fast forward to August.

August was when we took it to the next level.

We were out camping with friends. During the night, she woke me up. We went out to watch the moon over the lake. We were both standing.

I took a step forward, then tripped. I accidentally took her down with me. We tumbled down the shallow hill. When we hit land, she was on top of me.

"Um..." She said, blushing.

I didn't know what to say.

Then she chuckled. "Well, we're gonna do it sooner or later, right...?"

I remember nodding.

"Well, let's do it right now."

"But... I've never done it before."

"Nor have I."

"...Well, okay then."

August changed everything.

September.

That's when school started again, and go figure, we were in the same classes.

October.

That's when I bought a ring.

November.

That's when...

Well...

We arranged a meeting.

"5:00?" She asked.

"Yeah, sure."

"It's a date!"

I showed up early. Or rather... I didn't technically show up. She never saw me. But I saw her.

And she was kissing someone else.

December.

"Hey, can I talk to you after school?"

"Sure." I thought, if anything, the ring was my last hope.

I arrived on time. "There you are," she said.

We both said at the same time, "There's something important I need to tell you."

"You first." I said.

I don't exactly remember what she said, but...

I remember dropping the ring, and running away.

That's when I decided to visit Japan. Of all places, surely Japan could give me some peace and quiet...

After getting off at the airport, I bumped into Kouhei.

"Oh, um, hello." I said.

"Hey," he said. "Say, you're not from here, are you?"

"No, I'm from America."

He nodded his head. "Why are you in Japan?"

"Peace, and quiet."

"Well hey," he said. "If you're looking for peace and quiet, try Tagami. It's quiet over there. Not much action since a while ago..."

"Thanks.."

"Hey, I can call up my friends and ask if they can help you get used to Tagami."

"...Thanks..."

And the rest is history.

—————

"Oh." I said, I noticed Shiro was tearing up. "I... Didn't mean to-"

"It's fine." She said. "Just... Wow."

"Yeah."

Suddenly, I heard the sound of bells. "Masaki's calling us," she said.

"How do you know it's Masaki?"

"He's the only one who knows how to call me from a shrine."

I nodded. It made sense. "Fuyu, we're leaving, but we'll be back!" ...

No response.

\-------------

We walked through the mirror. "What's up, Masaki?" Josh asked.

"One of your friends from America is waiting for you at the train station." Masaki said.

Josh looked surprised. "Wow, I didn't think they'd actually come."

"How did they know you're in Tagami?" I asked.

"Before I left, I told a couple of my friends that I was going to Japan, so after asking a few people at the airport and train stations, it must've been easy to figure it out."

When we arrived at the train station, Josh asked, "So where are they?"

Masaki looked around. "...Right over... There!"

As Josh looked, he got tackled to the ground. "Ouch." He said. He looked up, saw who it was, then pushed her off of him. "Get off of me!" He said.

"Well, you don't sound too happy," the girl said.

"Gee, I wonder why."

"C'mon, you should be happy to see me!"

"Happy to see you." Josh repeated. He nodded, then yelled, "Of all people in this world, why would I be _happy_ to see _you_?!?!?!?"

I flinched, I've never seen somebody change emotions so quickly.

"Well, I _am_ your girlfriend," she said. Oh no, this couldn't be that girl Josh was talking about...

"Isa, that's bullshit." He said.

"Geez, language."

"You broke up with me and you know it."

"What are you talking about?"

"Isa, you know you did."

"Mmm.. no, I'm afraid I don't-"

At that sudden moment, Josh took out his staff, swung it, and stopped it right in front of Isa's face. He didn't say a word.

"Fine, you got me." She said. "I just wanted to see you."

"See me? For what?"

"I... Wanted to make up..."

"You wanted to make up..." Josh rolled his eyes. "Okay." Isa let a sigh of relief. "Now, Isa..." She made eye contact with him. "Stop lying, and tell me why you _actually_ came here."

Isa just laughed. "That's for me to know, and for you to never know."

Suddenly, everything was quiet. Then Josh swung his staff, and knocked Isa to the ground. He retracted his staff, and left without saying a word.

—————

_Equilibrium- noun, a state in which opposing influences or forces are balanced._

I was starting to feel better, at least better than before. It was a good sign, considering I was only getting **worse** before.

I walked out of my room. Josh and Mom weren't back yet. I decided I would meet up with them. I opened the front door. Josh sat on the porch, looking into the distance.

"What's wrong?" I asked. He flinched.

"Oh, hey Fuyu." He said. "It's, um... A long story..."

"Where's mom?"

"I would imagine she's coming back right now."

Just as he guessed, mom came running to the house. "Josh!" She said. "What were you thinking? She had to be taken to an ER!"

"Good." Was all he said.

"What?" Mom had calmed down now.

"Good." He repeated. "She deserved it."

She sat down next to him. "What do you mean?"

I sat down in front of the door, eager to hear what was going on. Shirou was also there.

"Think about it," Josh said. "She took my love and..." He made a dropping motion with his hand. "...Shattered it."

"Well-" Mom was about to say something, but Josh continued.

"And then she had the nerve to show up in Tagami, and think it would be a-okay. She's crazy."

"...Well..." Mom wasn't sure what to say now.

"Crazy." Josh repeated.

—————————————

"Isa..." Yuuki said. "Unusual name."

"Yeah," I said. "But apparently, she has some history with Josh."

"Mmm." Yuuki said. I should really say it now, just get it out of my system.

"Yuuki..."

"Yeah?"

But my mind had won over my heart again. "Nothing..."

Yuuki shrugged, and went back to working on his homework.

I wasn't complaining, it seemed my mind and my body were working together again, but not on the whole "weird feeling" thing.

——————————————

_A homeostasis disruption doesn't always have immediate effects; it may take some time for symptoms to show._

_——————————————_

By the next day, I felt fully healthy. It was like I was never sick in the first place.

When I went to meet up with Yuuki, somebody called me.

"Hey!" She said. When she got closer, she looked a bit disappointed. "Oh... You're not Shiro-sama."

"No, I'm Fuyu. Shiro's daughter."

"Oh. Well, I'm Isa. I just got here a few days ago."

_Isa_. I realized. "Hey! You're the one who made Josh sad!" I said.

"Ah, so he's told you about me."

"Yes! And you're a horrible person!"

She rolled her eyes, pushed me aside, then walked away.

I felt sick, but not in a health-type way.

—————

I felt like I needed to talk with another experienced god about this.

"It's just... Not right, Mikami!" I said. "I mean, how did she get sick in the first place?!?"

Mikami shrugged. "There are but a handful of reasons why a god could get sick."

"Let's hear em!"

"If the god is dying, losing its power, losing it's body's internal balance, or extremely stressed."

"But Fuyu always seems just fine, she's not dying, I know that. Stressed... Maybe..."

"What would Fuyu be stressed about?"

"She has a crush on Yuuki."

"Oh." Mikami was surprised. "Well."

I sighed. "Anyways, thanks Mikami. I better go back home and talk to Fuyu, then."

"No problem." She said. Then she paused what she was doing. "Wait. Shiro, come here."

"Okay...?" I went over to Mikami. She immediately pressed her ear against my stomach.

"Hm." She said. "I knew I sensed something." Then she stood up.

"Sensed wha-... Oh."

She nodded. "You'd better talk to Josh, too."

———————————————

Isa was walking towards the house.

"Fuyu, stay in here," I said.

"Okay, but why?" Fuyu asked.

"Just... Trust me." I went outside, and closed the door behind me. "What do _you_ want?"

"I came to say hello." Isa said.

"You're not welcome here. Get out."

"And why should I~?"

"Fuyu, go back inside."

"How did you know I'm-" Fuyu said.

"Inside!" I said. Fuyu went back inside.

"Hm. She listens to you."

"She's like a daughter to me, and I'm like a father to her."

" _Like_ a father? Where's her real dad?"

"It's a story you don't need to know about."

"Actually, I think-"

I took out my staff again, and stood it up on the ground. "Leave. Now."

"No."

"Fine, we'll do it your way." I retracted my staff. Isa looked surprised. Then I ran, and extended the staff again, this time at an arm's length from her, and tripped her.

"Wha- how did you-?"

"Leave." I held up one staff end to her face. "Now."

She got up and left.

———————————————

Shiro was in the other room, talking to Fuyu. I was reading _Combat in May_. It was quite the story, so far.

To sum it up, Masaki is attempting to cheer up Mayoi, who now realizes her life's work just went down the drain. That's about all so far.

After Shiro was done talking to Fuyu, she came in, and laid down next to me.

"Josh," she said. "There's something I need to talk to you about."

"Okay," I said. I closed the book, and looked at her. "I'm listening."

"I was talking to Mikami today, and found out-" she was interrupted by the sound of bells. "-um, let's go."

———————————————

"What's going on now, Masaki?" I asked.

"It's about Isa." Masaki said. "She wants to talk to you, and won't shut up about it."

"You have full permission from a Tagami god to injure her." I said.

"Sorry, not my thing. That's Yuki's." We all shared a laugh.

"Alright, if she's not shutting up about it... Where is she?"

"Last I checked, behind the estate."

"Alright. Come on, Shiro."

"Um..." Masaki said. "She said alone."

"Yeah, that's not happening. Come on, Shiro."

"Coming!" Shiro called.

"She's not gonna talk, then."

"Masaki, trust me when I say I can read Isa like a kindergarten book."

——————————————

Isa turned. "Oh, there you are! And you're alone!"

"Yeah," I said. "Just me."

"Great, there's something you should know-"

"You're leaving Tagami." I interrupted her. She looked astonished.

"W-what?"

"Tomorrow. First thing. You're not staying here."

She stomped her foot. "And what gives you the authority to do that?!?"

"..."

"Well?"

"Okay, if you must know." I stood up my staff on the ground. "I am a god of Tagami."

"Oh yeah? Prove it."

"If you say so." I breathed in, then, "Hah!" A gust of wind knocked Isa off her feet.

"That was a coincidence!"

"Isa, I refuse to drag this conversation on any longer. You're leaving. Tomorrow! No questions."

"Make me."

I sighed. "Fine."

She came at me, with a fist ready. I could see the fire in her eyes, she looked like she could break a boul-

I knocked her out with one hit.

—————

"Don't come back." I said, as Isa's train door closed.

"Geez, you really changes around her." Kouhei said.

"Gee, I wonder why."

"...Why?" Sanae asked.

"Simple; Isa is a cold-hearted bitch." I said.

"That's going a little _too_ far." Yuki said.

"Trust me when I say it's an understatement."

———————————————

I ran to the train station. Sure enough, there was Josh with our friends. I ran to join the group.

"Oh hey, Shiro," Josh said.

"Josh, there's something I need to talk to you about."

"Okay," he said. But he didn't move.

"In private..."

"Ohhh, okay." He followed me, and when we were alone enough, I turned to him, and started explaining.

"I met up with Mikami to talk about Fuyu's illness, don't worry Fuyu will be fine, and Mikami... Sensed something."

Josh looked confused.

I locked eye contact with him, smiled while blushing, and said, "I'm... Pregnant."

**-=-=-=-=-=-**

I didn't get it.

I shouldn't be continuing to not fall in love, only to fall right back in love with that boy. I thought about this, and how Josh wouldn't bother listening to me.

I slammed my fist on the armrest of the bench. "Damn it!" I said out loud. Everybody on the train looked at me. I looked away.

A god. He had become a god. There's probably no way or chance of me getting back into Tagami.

...Or maybe...

And a _maybe_ larger than the universe itself...

...Just maybe, I could find a loophole...

_The name's Mayoi-chan!_

_Oh yeah, gods create boundaries all the time. But sometimes, there's ways to get past them._

_I used to be a god hunter myself, but... Um... Things change._

_Weapons? Sure, I've never thrown them out._

When did Shiro say again? October? Perfect.

I'm going to kill 2 birds with one chopstick gun.

And, nonetheless...

I'll do it on their most important day of the year.


	6. Planning In June

"A human wedding?" I asked.

"Yeah, I thought it'd be a nice change. After all, I'm usually giving out the blessings." Shiro said.

"So... Who's doing the blessings this time?"

"Mikami. Sure, it goes against tradition to have a foreign god do the blessings, but some things just aren't as unbreakable as they seem."

"Breaking tradition... Wow, I'd never imagined a god doing that."

"We do it all the time, the humans adapt the tradition soon afterwards."

"Mmm... So... What about that 'sharing of blessings'?"

"Are you talking about who's gonna do it? I originally planned for it to be Fuyu and Yuuki..."

"I thought we were trying to keep them as _friends_."

"Well, I can't exactly think of anybody else. Can you?"

"...You got me there."

Shiro smiled.

"Still.. a human wedding. We'd better start planning."

"Already started!"

"Oh? Then when is the wedding?"

"October."

———————————

"Yuki, look at this." I said, handing Yuki the envelope.

"Oh... Uh, what?" Yuki asked. She turned the letter over, upside-down, sideways. "There's no way they planned to have a normal wedding, and not a god one..."

I shrugged. "It's what it says."

Yuuki walked in. "Oh here, Yuuki. You got mail, too." I handed him the envelope with his name on it.

"Oh, uh, thank you." He said. I turned back to Yuki, who was still thinking it was some kind of joke.

*******************************

"October?" I asked. "That's an odd month for a wedding..."

Shiro shrugged. "I figured it would give us enough time to plan everything out."

"Mm." Truth be told, I didn't mind October. But... I had this strange feeling. It made me feel like something bad is going to happen in October. I shrugged it off. I may be a god, but I can't read the future.

Right?

"Whatcha thinking about?"

"Huh? Oh... Nothing." Nothing at all.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Ouch!" I told myself. I sighed. "Looks like I was right."

A boundary had been put around Tagami. There was no way I was getting in... Until they turn a blind eye to the barrier. I walked back home.

Passing the train station, I heard somebody excitedly say something about a wedding. A wedding between two gods.

I ran to the voice. "What?!?" I asked. I had already knew about the wedding, but I didn't know enough.

"There's going to be a wedding between two gods! Shiro-sama, and Josh-sama!"

"When?"

"In October!"

"When in October?"

"I think the 27th..."

"Where?"

The man shrugged. "Nobody really knows yet, but it's going to end at Mt. Ookami."

"Wait wait wait... A _human_ wedding between two gods?" Somebody asked.

"Yeah! Strange, isn't it?"

This was all the information I needed. "Thanks!" I said, as I ran off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I looked at the letter, speechless.

I had been chosen to participate in the sharing of blessings. I just had to find a partner. A love one, apparently.

_Fuyu_. That was the first thought that came to mind.

_No no no, it'd just feel weird._

I cycled through the people I knew. Hm.

Welp, time to go out and meet some new people.

——————————  
Where's a good place to start? I looked around town. I've been out of the boundaries of my normal schedule before, but never this much. I usually just relied on finding friends in school.

"Yuuki!" I heard a voice say. I turn around. It was Asa.

"Oh. What's up, Asa?" I asked.

"What's up with you? I usually don't see you outside of the estate or school."

"I'm trying to find somebody for this." I handed her the letter.

"Wow! Congratulations!" She said. "The gods' wedding, too! It's all anybody is talking about."

"I mean, I kind of guessed I'd get invited, but-"

"What made you think that?"

"My father has a history with Shiro-sama, apparently. Anyways, as I was saying, I never thought I'd get to participate in the sharing of blessings. Now, if I could only find somebody..."

"You... Could take me."

"You? I never thought you'd be interested."

"Why wouldn't I be...?"

"We're just friends."

"Yeah, but..." Asa was about to say something. "N-nevermind..." I felt a rain drop. I looked up.

"We'd better get going," I said.

I stood up, and started walking. "H-hey! Wait up!" Asa said.

A few minutes later, the rain really started coming down. We were running. I looked at Asa. Her hair looked like it was flowing in the wind. It definitely reminded you that she is indeed, a member of the Uesigi family.

We arrived at the estate a couple minutes later. "You can stay here until the storm calms." I offered.

"Thank you!" She said.

———————————————

The storm wasn't going anywhere anytime soon. It only seemed to be getting worse. But that's okay. Because I'm with Yuuki.

"So," he said. "You're actually interested in the sharing of blessings?"

"Y-yeah," I said.

"Hm... Well, I guess if I can't find anybody to go with..."

I could feel myself getting excited.

"...I could give you the letter, so you can find somebody to go with you."

...Oh. Of course.

"Yep..." I said.

"So... you called your parents, right?"

"Yeah. They're busy right now."

Yuuki nodded. It was easy for him to make small talk, but I can't recall him actually making a normal-length conversation on a topic.

"Oh, right, I wanted to ask you something." I said. "What do you mean that your father has a history with Shiro-sama?"

"According to him and mom, father dated Shiro-sama for quite a while... But, in the end, it didn't work out."

"How so?"

"I don't know, neither of them have ever told me."

"Do you think they're trying to keep it a secret for until you're older?"

"I would imagine so, yes."

I started thinking about this. I guess secrets are secrets. But they had to come out eventually.

_And sometimes... Eventually means..._

"I love you, Yuuki!" I cover my mouth. Did I just blurt that out?!?!? What kind of idiot am I?!?

_...Right now._

Yuuki was surprised.

"I-I'm sorry, that just blurted out..."

"It's fine."

"No, it's not! I didn't want to-"

"Asa."

"What?"

———————————  
The rain had left a mood. The puddles on the sidewalk, the cloudy weather, the dampness in the air...

Everything was so... Colorless. I could feel my body hurting again.

I wasn't going back. Not anymore. It's not like I'm needed there.

Yuuki had found somebody else.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I grabbed _Bridal June_. What a coincidence. _Bridal June_. Right now, I'm trying to figure out my wedding for October. But it's still June. Huh.

This one was a little different. This one isn't by Masaki, but instead by Kouhei. Should be interesting.

Fuyu walked through the door, completely soaked. If that wasn't enough, she didn't look in the best mood, either.

"Fuyu!" I said. "What happened?"

She didn't answer. She closed the front door, then sat in front of it, without a word.

_Okay, something's wrong._ I closed the book, and sat next to Fuyu. "What's wrong?"

"..."

"C'mon, Fuyu. You can tell me."

"..."

"Is it something you want to talk to Shiro about?"

Fuyu shook her head. An answer. Not for the question I was hoping, but at least it shows she's not entranced in her own world. Not completely, anyways.

"...Well, if you want to talk about later, you know where-"

"No...... I need to tell _somebody_."

"Okay."

"It's about Yuuki..."

"Did something happen to him?"

"Yeah..."

"What happened to him?"

"...Love..." Fuyu whispered. I could see that she was about to cry.

"C'mon," I said, helping Fuyu up. "You'd better lay down."

After I closed Fuyu's door, I could hear her starting to sniffle.

_...Love..._ From her tone, it didn't sound like the love was for her.

It appeared Yuuki had found another girl.

Shiro came through the front door. She could see the look on my face.

"What happened?" She asked.

"I'm unsure as to if this is good or bad news."

"What is it?"

"We don't have to worry about the whole 'sibling' thing between Fuyu and Yuuki. The bad thing? Fuyu is heartbroken. Depressed, I'd even go as far to say."

"So wait, that means that Yuuki is in love..."

"...With a girl who isn't Fuyu."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It didn't seem unusual for me. When father was presented with a problem similar to mine, grandma had helped him by teaching to _experiment_.

That's all Asa is. A test. But I won't let her know that.

"So when is it again?" She asked.

"October." I said.

"Y'know, I'm happy to be here with you."

"Happy to be here with _you._ " I smiled. She smiled back. I've been told that my ability to lie is so strong, that I could trick a god.

Not literally, I'm sure.

Although... The way Shiro-sama and Josh-sama are... Maybe I could trick em.

I'm not going to try. That'd just be idiotic.

And possibly a long lecture from father.

————————————

I've always wondered if being a human girl felt any different.

But I've never wanted to be one. I'm happy with being a god. But it makes me different. A lot different.

I don't go to a high school, unlike every other kid in Tagami.

Why I don't go, I'll never know.

But like I said, it makes me different. Is that why Yuuki chose that girl? Because she's a _human_ , not a _god_?

No. That can't be it. It can't.

Can it...? No! I'm not even going to question it.

But... Then again...

I've always wondered if being a human girl felt any different.

I've never wanted to be one...

...Until now.

I could feel my body ache again. I could feel myself getting weaker.

This time, it was different than before.

I tried to stop myself, but my thoughts just pushed against it.

Could I really answer my own question?

Mother is always telling me, "You'll find somebody else."

But what if I don't?

"Trust me. And don't worry, you've got until the end of time."

But what about the time between now and when I finally find my soulmate?

"It'll be okay. I've been through it, too."

_It's okay._ It's okay.

But I'm not like my mother.

So, no. It's not okay.

It's not okay. At all.

I'm stuck in the middle of a story between a girl, a goddess, and a boy. How is that okay?

———————————

_Achoo!_ I could barely smell a thing.

"Don't tell me you're getting sick, too." Shiro said.

"No, no." I said. "It's just this sudden change in weather. My body just got used to it being warm and damp, now it's cold and dry. Just out of nowhere..." _Achoo!_ "... It's not a cold, just sinus problems."

"Well... Alright."

"So how _is_ Fuyu's illness-?" Sanae asked.

"It was fine, then just yesterday, it took an expected drop." Shiro said.

"'Expected'?" Yuki asked.

"Fuyu is really sad, so her illness getting worse wasn't really a surprise."

"Sad? Why is she sad?"

"Really? You don't know? I thought you and Masaki would be the first to know."

"About what?" Masaki asked.

"Yuuki. He's in love with Asa."

"Asa..." Yuki was thinking about this. "Oh! That's Moyori's kid, right?"

"Yeah, I believe so."

Kouhei didn't look very excited, but still kind of excited. Moyori was a subject for him, just as Isa was a sore subject for me.

"Well, at least it means we don't have to worry about him and Fuyu..." I said.

"That's probably the only light in this situation for us." Shiro said.

"Do you think Fuyu will do anything... Drastic?" Kouhei asked.

"I doubt it."  Me and Shiro said.

If only we knew what would happen in July...


	7. Natural July

  
Warm, cold, warm, warm, cold. I've been keeping record of the weather recently.

It's changing, and quite a lot, too. I wonder why that is.

"The weather hasn't been this unpredictable since several years ago..." Masaki said.

"What happened several years ago?"

"You still have those books?"

"Yeah."

"Read _Theological July_. You'll find out why."

"Can't you just tell me?"

"That'd be the natural thing to do, yes."

 _Natural_. Nothing in Tagami is natural. That's why Masaki loves it here so much. He loves unrealistic things. Unnatural things.

That's why he 'dated' Shiro and Yuki all those years ago. Both unnatural. A goddess, and a girl, both falling in love with a human boy at first sight.

Honestly, if I never came to Tagami and fell in love with a god myself...

I would've never believed it.

Hell, I never would've believed in a god.

Much less one falling in love with a human.

Ehhhhh... But then again, there's those _Percy Jackson_ movies...

...Nah. Those are just fiction, anyways.

I looked up at the sky. It had been cloudy for so long, I forgot the sky is blue. A gust of wind nearly knocked me out of my seat.

"It's the changing of the seasons." Masaki said.

I'll take that answer.

———————————

I swear, this wasn't supposed to happen.

It should be impossible.

But...

It _did_ happen. I have to keep it a secret. But... It's not very easy.

\---------------

Fuyu said she felt just fine. She looked like it, too. She was even smiling. I decided we should get some training in before she gets sick again.

Fuyu lowered her body, ready to charge. I was ready to block. Fuyu charged. I blocked.

"That... Was worse than last time." I said. "At least you actually got past my first block before."

"It's been a while..." Fuyu said. I guess it was true, but it didn't feel like it.

"Try again."

"Alright." Fuyu again got in the ready position, as did I. Fuyu ran, then I dodged, then prepared to attack. I spun around, ready to counter, but Fuyu had already fell.

"I, uh... Tripped..."

I sighed. Something was different about her. I just can't figure out what.

Later that day...

"Hey," Josh said as he sat next to me.

"Hey." I replied. I looked down.

"How's our baby?"

"Fine."

He smiled. I smiled back. He grabbed my hand. "I love you." He said.

"I love you, too." I placed my head on his shoulder. "What are we gonna do about Fuyu?"

"No clue," he replied. "I guess we just have to wait for her to get over Yuuki."

"She seemed over him..."

"Children know how to hide things, emotions being some of the most common. Some hide it better than others." He sighed.

"That's the thing, Fuyu has never been good at hiding emotions..."

"Then I don't know."

"I'm just... Scared."

"Scared? About what?"

"About _her_. I'm afraid she'll do something drastic..."

"Do you want me to talk to her?"

"If you think she'll listen."

\----------------

"Here I come!" Asa said, nearly knocking me over.

"Hey! Watch where you're going!" I said.

"I was!" She said, laughing.

"Well, you said you wanted to meet me here. So what's up?"

"Nothing, I just wanted to hang out."

I nodded. I must admit, Asa was kind of growing on me. But still. She's just an experiment.

As will Fuyu be. But right now, just Asa.

Fuyu.

Hey, speaking of Fuyu... When was the last time I saw her...?

————————————

This shouldn't be possible. It _shouldn't_.

I can't stop thinking this.

As I'm on my 100th question, Josh walks in. "Hey," I said.

"Hey," he replied. "How are things going?"

"...Good."

"Fuyu, stop lying."

I sighed. "Horribly."

"Why? Still about Yuuki?"

"No."

"Hm... Then... Why?"

"I don't know..."

"Well, anything else?"

"Promise not to tell?"

"You can count on me."

"I feel like my body's changing."

"I don't think you should be talking to _me_ about that-"

"Not in that way. Like... I feel weaker."

"Weaker...?"

"Yeah."

"Could just be a lingering effect of your illness. Shouldn't last too long."

"Oh. Okay."

He knew. But he wasn't going to tell anybody.

"I will never understand you, Fuyu."

"I plan to keep it that way." We both laughed.

———————————

Me and Shiro were sitting together in the living room. We were having a normal conversation, then she asks, "So did you find out what's wrong with Fuyu?"

"Nope," I lied. "Must be some lingering effects of her illness."

"I guess that would make sense."

\---------------

"Oh yeah," Asa said. "My mom told me all about it. Hard to believe that somebody would two-time the Towada princess and the local god."

"I never understood it, either," I said. Me and Asa were eating lunch together. The town was as noisy as ever.

"Hey, you're not gonna two-time me, right?"

I had to change the subject. "So what do you think the sharing of blessings will be like?"

"Oh shoot, that's right. Rehearsals start tomorrow."

"Oh yeah." Truthfully, I completely forgot about the rehearsals. Josh-sama's and Shiro-sama's rehearsals start later in the month than ours. But then again, they just have to kiss, ride Shirou, and receive a blessing. We have to make sure to ring bells at the right time, to say the right lines, and stand in the right places. Sounds easy, right?

No. No it isn't.

"Don't tell me you forgot."

"I didn't."

"Suuuuure." Asa said with a smile. She believed me, but she got a kick out of pretending to not believe me. It made me laugh, too. She was really starting to grow on me.

Suddenly, I felt a drop of water. I looked up. "Asa, we'd better go inside."

So we did. Just in time, too. It started raining cats and dogs as soon as we stepped into _Sanae_.

****************************

"And every ten steps, you'll ring this bell." I was handed a bell. I never understood it. Why bells? Of all objects?

"So you got it?" The man asked. "Let's recap: Asa, when do you ring your bell?"

"Whenever we pass somebody." Asa replied.

"Good, good. And Yuuki? When do you ring your bell?"

"Every 10 steps."

"Okay, good. Let's practice."

We started walking at a normal pace. Since this was practicing, we weren't going to walk all the way to the shrine. Just a few streets down, then back.

"I can't wait to do the actual thing." Asa said.

"Me neither." I said.

After practicing the bells, we had to start practicing our lines.

Some lines were changed, due to there being a foreign god doing the blessings. They were still pretty similar, but at the same time, an obvious change.

———————————

My body was not meant to do this. I thought I'd adapt to the change over time, but I was wrong. I'm not getting stronger, I'm just getting weaker.

"Are you sure it's just from her illness?" Mom asked Josh.

"Probably," Josh replied.

"So you're not 100% sure?"

"The only I could be is if we did an operation, but that's unnecessary. She's not dying."

"And how do we know that?"

"I don't know."

"Well... You can't just assume that!"

"It's just a cold, most people survive that."

"Just a cold?"

"Just a cold. That's what the symptoms are showing."

Josh was good at keeping our secret. I, however, was not so good.

——————————————

"Fuyu!" Shiro exclaimed. Fuyu had passed out.

 _Dammit,_ I told myself. _I should've said something._

"I think it's more than a cold," Shiro said.

"Yeah, she's becoming human." I replied.

"You knew?!?"

"Yeah, but this wasn't supposed to happen! Her body should've adapted to it..."

"I'll get angry at you later. Let's take her to Masaki's dad and see if he knows anything."

After we arrived at Masaki's old house, his dad could already see that Fuyu was in trouble.

"Lemme guess: She lost her powers?"

"Try she went full human." I replied.

"Ooh, that's a new one."

He thought about this for a moment, then said, "Don't worry, I know a place where we can get her powers back."

"You do? Where?"

"Don't tell me..." Shiro said.

"All you need to know is it's a place where they have a festival in August."


	8. Another Festive August

"Well, this is a familiar sight." Yuki said, as Masaki threw up into the ocean.

Shiro was sitting next to me, and Fuyu was sitting next to her. Fuyu was sleeping.

"Don't worry," I said to Shiro. "Everything will be fine."

"But how can we be so sure?" She asked.

I tried to think of an example. Yuki, who was in earshot, helped me. "Don't worry, Shiro." Yuki said. "This has happened before, remember? Just, hopefully this time, the god doesn't go on the loose."

"Please don't remind me of that," Shiro said. "I'm worried enough as it is."

Shiro grabbed my arm, and leaned against me.

"Fuyu will be just fine." I reassured her. "Don't worry."

I could feel her breathe in, then out. "If you say so," she said. "I guess this has happened before."

——————————————

I started nibbling on a fish. I looked at Yuuki. He didn't bring Asa this time. She must've been busy.

He didn't seem too bothered by it. He came over, and sat next to me.

"Hey," he said. "You all right?"

"No." I stated honestly. I felt like I was going to collapse at any moment.

"This festival... Apparently it _has_ worked before. So don't lose hope, okay?"

"...Okay." I replied. "...Where's Asa?"

"She stayed back to practice for the sharing of blessings. I should've, too. But I just have to see what this ritual is like."

"I don't think they do it in front of millions of people..."

"Eh. Either way, it'll still be exciting."

The boat came to a stop.

"We're here." Yuuki stood up. "The island of Rokushiki."

——————————

As soon as we stepped off the boat, 3 people came running up to greet Masaki, Yuki, Shiro, Kouhei, Sanae, and Ao. From what I can assume, those 3 people must know them.

"It's been a while," A girl with long, black, curly hair said.

"No kidding," Masaki replied.

A girl with short, black hair looked at Masaki and Yuki's hands, then said, "So you two finally tied the knot, huh?"

"Of course," Yuki said. "What? Did you expect otherwise?"

After Yuki said that, Shiro looked more down than before. I walked over to her, and grabbed her hand. She cheered up a little. "Thanks," she said softly.

The girl with long, curly hair walked over to me and Shiro. She looked at me. "Hello," she said. "I am Magari. Who might you be?"

"I am Josh," I said. "I am a god of Tagami, and Shiro's fiance."

"It's a pleasure to meet you." Magari said. Then she turned to Masaki and Yuki. "So what brings you guys here?"

"Remember how Shiro lost her powers all those years ago?" Masaki asked.

"Yeah...?"

"Well, we're in a similar situation, except this time, it's with Shiro's daughter, Fuyu."

I looked over at Fuyu, who was talking to Yuuki. They seemed to be getting along again.

"So I'm guessing you're here for the ritual?" A girl with orange hair and glasses asked.

"Why else would we bring Fuyu?" Masaki asked.

"Good point."

I heard somebody running behind me. I grabbed a hold of their staff just as it was about to hit me. "You sure know how to make a first impression." I said.

"Friend of Masaki and Yuki?" The girl asked.

"Friend. Are you a friend of them?" The girl nodded in agreement.

"Sorry, you were an unfamiliar face and I felt a strong presence coming from you."

"That'd make sense, me being a god and all."

"God? Of where?"

"Tagami, of course."

"I see." She pulled her staff out of my hands, and back to her side.

"That's Naomi," Magari explained. "Known for not saying much, and being a master of martial arts."

Reality was staying confusing as ever.

———————————

I sat down right before the lake. It was something about water that just calmed me down in the worst of situations. I looked at my reflection. It was amazing, we'd always look at ourselves, but never think, _I'm here, and I deserve to be here_. We always just look at ourselves and say, _That's me_.

The starlit sky shone beautifully over the water. For a moment, there was nothing but the sounds of the lake. Frogs, fish bopping up every now and then, the wind...

Nature was so relaxing.

Then I heard yelling, and somebody storming out of the house. A fight just broke out, which was normal among some couples, and that can be scary sometimes. Me and Shiro had only had one fight, but I don't even remember what it was about. We made up pretty quickly. But I'd never expect those two to fight. They always seem so happy.

"Hey, Yuki," I said.

"How'd you know it was me?"

"It was either you or Masaki, and I took a guess."

"Well, lucky guess, then."She sat next to me.

"I woulda never thought you two would fight."

"Seriously?"

"You two always seem like the happiest couple."

"I wouldn't say that..." She said, quietly. "We've had our fair share of fights."

"Mmm." I nodded. I skipped a pebble. It skipped twice, before landing in the water.

"So why are you out here?"

"Just thinking."

"About what?"

"The first time I met Shiro."

"You mean at the cafe? To me, that wouldn't be a very memorable experience."

"No, it was before that." I said. "And it was a near-death experience." Before I could go on, a small patch of the water in front of me lit up.

"A near-death experience?"

I nodded. "It was Febr- no wait, January..." An image appeared in the water.

_—————————————_

_It was a school field trip to_ _Sakashima_ _..._

_"You mean_ _Madoi's_ _home town?"_

_Yeah, that_ _Sakashima_ _. Anyways, we were walking along the boundary, and the guide was telling this really long story about gods... I didn't pay attention. The storm was really starting to kick up._

"Achoo!" I sneezed. I could barely see three feet in front of me, why were we on this trip? I couldn't remember. Some kid from behind me trips me. By now, I was used to this. I was always picked on in elementary school.

_What I didn't expect was what happened next._

I found myself alone. I'm sure they were near, but I had lost my sense of direction. The snow was so thick, I didn't know where north was, east was...

I started scrambling in all directions. I tripped over a line of rocks. I knew I was on the other side. Now I knew I was lost. I was just going to have to wait.

I sat down in the snow, it collected on me. I felt like a part of the ground. It wasn't nice.

Time passed. Nothing. More time passed. Nothing. I wanted to shout for help, but I found myself unable to. I didn't realize how weak the cold was making me.

A small whisper was all I could do. _Help._ Nothing. Not like I'd expected anything.

_After that, I can't remember. But I know I woke up in a Tagami shrine. And there she was. The god of Tagami._

"Well," she said. "Look who's up."

I opened my mouth to speak, but I still felt too weak to even talk. I whispered, _How did you find me?_

"You called for me, didn't you?"

Did I? I couldn't remember. _My whisper_? I asked.

"What? No, your mind. You knew the phrase."

_What phrase?_

"You... Really don't remember, do you...?"

I shook my head.

"Well... Don't worry about it, you should be safe here. I did my best to keep the cold air from coming in here." She went up onto a wolf.

_Wait... You're leaving?_

"Yeah, I've got my own kid to take care of."

_B-but, who are you?_

"Shiro, the god of Tagami." Then she left.

_I was eventually found. How they'd guess to look in a shrine, I'd never know. But I have my theories._

_—————————_

"Wow," was all Yuki said.

"Yeah." I said.

"Hm... So you knew her before you came to Tagami..."

"Yep, funny thing is, I didn't even remember that till last month."

Yuki just nodded. "Speaking of you and Shiro, where is she?"

"Inside."

"Why aren't you with her?"

"Like I said, I was thinking." I smiled, thinking of Shiro.

"......How much do you love her?"

"More than anything else." The image in the water turned into images of me and Shiro.

Then it got dark. "I don't know what I'd do without her..." This thought had never occured to me before.

I shook my head. "B-but that's crazy! We love each other, we wouldn't leave each other." I repeated those words in my head.

We wouldn't leave each other.

"Anyways, why did you want to know, Yuki?"

"I was just making sure. I mean, so far, you're story has been pretty similar to Masaki's... I just wanted to make sure your feelings weren't the same as Masaki's."

——————————

After getting Fuyu to sleep, I left the room. Shiro was waiting for me.

"Nice job getting her to sleep," Shiro whispered. "It isn't normally that easy."

"What can I say?"

"She has a connection with you. Or at least is starting to gain one."

"I know, I can sense it."

She grabbed my hand. "You know, Josh..." Then she pulled me closer to her. "You continue to amaze me."

"How so? Aren't I like any other human you've met?"

"Maybe, but you're... Different, too. You always do something that I never would've guessed you doing."

"I'm a wild card? No, that's not me."

"No, but something like that." Then she grabbed my other hand.

"Then what?"

She moved one foot forward, and I moved mine backwards. "I don't know exactly. It's mysterious."

Suddenly, we were slow dancing to no music. "Is that good?" We carried on the conversation like nothing was happening.

"Yeah, it's better than good." She smiled. "I like it."

Our feet were moving elegantly and swiftly across the hall floor. I felt like I was on top of a cloud. "Well that's good." I blushed.

It felt so weird. I haven't danced like this since I was with...  
...  
...  
As we neared the end of the hall, I could feel the breeze coming through an open window. It brushed past us. It felt cool, but not too cool.

It felt like...  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
...Autumn.

It felt like autumn. Autumn. September...

...October...

As I looked at Josh as we were dancing, I was suddenly reminded of Masaki. That night he broke up with me. I couldn't hold it back.

I felt my knees get weak, then I nearly collapsed on the floor. But Josh was there to pick me up. Just in time.

"What's wrong?" He asked. "Why are you crying?" He knelt down to reach my eye level as I sat on the floor.

"I'm not... Crying..." Then I felt my own tears. I _was_ crying. I haven't cried over Masaki in so long... "It's just.... This dance reminded me of... The night when Masaki-"

He shushed me. "Say no more." Then he sat down next to me.

There was a long silence.

Then he started crying, too.

"Love is confusing." He said.

"Love is confusing, reality is merciless, and life is unfair." I said. "Is there anything positive about this world?"

Another long silence.

...

Then he spoke again.

"You know, Shiro..." Then he looked at me. "Isa is a bitch."

————————————

The town was now bustling with activity. Everybody getting their tents set up, wheelbarrows of food pushed around.

It looked like people were preparing for harvest season. So frantic.

Then again, they had reason to. Just 6 hours until the festival starts.

Some kid tripped and dropped a few tomatoes. A person who I assume was his father helped him up... But left the tomatoes on the ground. Not bothering to clean up the mess. This was different.

The town had become a mess.

"Are people this crazy during December?" I asked Shiro.

"Not usually," she said. "Only if they had a plentiful harvest."

Made sense. If it's a good harvest, they have a lot to sell. They gotta be the first to set up shop.

I looked at the time. Nearly time for that ritual.

 _Don't worry,_ _Fuyu_ _._ I thought to myself. _Everything is going to work out._

Everything is going to work out...  
Right?

Right. Why wouldn't it?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The temple was big. Bigger than mine and Shiro's back in Tagami. It made me wonder what they could possibly need all that space for.

Shiro was sitting with me on the steps, while Masaki and the others were reminiscing with Magari and her friends about what happened here a while ago.

Multiple gods for one piece of land. Insane.

Oh... Wait...

Let me rephrase that. _Several_ gods for one piece of land.

That's better. Sounds better. Is it better? I don't care, I'm keeping it.

There were still several gods here, but it was under control now. All of them are calm.

"I wonder where Fuyu is," Shiro said.

As if on cue, Fuyu came running in from up North, straight through the temple doors.

Taking Yuuki along with her. I rolled my eyes. I knew that was coming.

"Now we wait," Shiro said.

"We could use some help with setting up for the festival," Magari said. "If you don't mind."

"Sure," I said. "I don't mind."

"I'll stay and wait." Shiro said quickly. She sounded nervous. I thought about staying back...

_Nah, Shiro's got this._

"See you, then." I said. I hugged her before I left.

-===============-

"You seem to have a lot of energy." Yuuki stated.

"That's good," a woman in purple hair stated. "It'll make this a lot easier."

"I can't wait to get my powers back." I said. Then I looked at Yuuki. "And I can't wait to do it with you."

He smiled.

"Alright then," the purple-haired woman's daughter said. "Let's get started, shall we?"

"I'm ready," Yuuki said.

"And so am I." I said.

"Great," The woman said. "Then please step forward, Fuyu."

I took a few steps till I was told to stop. I was in the center of the room. Everything about this place gave me chills. Good chills.

It felt empowering already.

The woman put one foot in front of her. "Gods of Rokushiki, heed my call!"

After that, a series of things happened.

The room started glowing.

The woman started chanting an ancient spell or something.

The glowing got more intense.

And then it got brighter.

Then brighter.

Then it stopped.

And then...!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"...Nothing." Fuyu said. "I don't feel any different."

"What?" The woman's daughter said.

"Now, Nanaki, calm down." The woman said.

"But... It didn't-!"

"Relax, I'm sure there's an explanation." She cleared her throat. "Fuyu, do you... Fuyu?"

But she was too late. Fuyu had already ran out of the temple.

————————————

"Fuyu!" I screamed. But she wasn't listening. "Fuyu, get back here!"

Yuuki, Ruki, and Nanaki came running out of the temple.

"Did it work?" I asked.

"No," Yuuki said. "Not even a little."

"What?!"

"Relax," Ruki said. "We'll figure out what went wrong."

"So you're going to find Fuyu?"

"Correct."

"Then I am coming along."

"I don't think it's wise to do that. Maybe you should go with J-"

"I am Fuyu's mother, and you cannot stop me from finding my daughter." I crossed my arms. "I am coming along."

Ruki knew she was defeated. "Fine, then follow us."

I smiled, then followed them down the path.

••••••••••••••••••••••

I ran as fast as I could. But I could already feel myself getting weaker.

Keep.

Running.

Don't.

Stop.

I repeated these four words in my head over and over.

And then I started getting dizzy. I took rest in bushes nearby.

Finally. Some peace.

...

Heh heh, but for how long? A god can't live this long without their powers. I should be dead. But I'm not.

Why is that?

This very thought made me start crying.

 _No._ I thought. _I don't want to die._

_I want to stay._

_Stay with everybody._

_Mom, Josh, Yuki, Masaki..._

_And Yuuki._

_Especially Yuuki._

"No." I whispered to myself.

"This isn't where it ends."

I pushed myself up to my feet. I stumbled to keep balance. But I had to keep going.

Keep.

Going.

I struggled to walk in a straight line.

I was so dizzy. But that's ok. It's nothing. Nothing.

I decided to think of all the people who helped me through my troubles before.

 _Mom._  
I felt a little better.  
_Yuki._  
_Masaki._  
Better.  
_Josh._  
At least my vision was getting better.  
Just one person left that I could think of...

"Yuuki." I said. "You're here."

There he was. Standing in front of me.

"Why did you run away?" He asked.

"It didn't work." I teared up again. "It didn't work, everything did not turn out all right."

"Not everything _will_ turn out right, Fuyu."

"But this was supposed to go smoothly without any mistakes!"

"Everything has it's little hiccups."

"But this is more than just a hiccup!"

"Relax, Fuyu."

"I can't relax! I don't have much energy left! I could die at any minute, any second even! Then... Then everything would be gone. Everybody would be sad. I don't want that! I dont-"

And then he landed a big smooch on my lips. It made me feel even weaker.

In a good way.

"Shut up," he said with a smile.

I couldn't help but smile. "Thank you, Yuuki."

"For what?"

"Making me feel better."

"It's my job to do that."

"How so?"

"Because I love you."

My face felt like lava. "I... I love you, too, Yuuki."

He grabbed my hand. "Come on," he said. "Let's go."

I was feeling a bit better.

————————————

They retried the ritual. This time, changing a few things.

Needless to say, it went perfectly. Fuyu came bursting out with even more energy than usual.

She looked like she was celebrating a national holiday.

"It worked! It worked!" She was chanting as she ran out the temple doors.

Yuuki simply walked out of the temple with a smile on his face.

"I guess we can't stop them, huh?" Shiro asked me as Fuyu and Yuuki hugged each other.

I shrugged, as I contracted my staff. "I guess not."

"I guess it'll be fine."

"Look at them," I said. "They're perfect for each other."

Shiro giggled a bit. Then she grabbed my hand. "Just like us."

"Just like us."

After that, we stayed for the festival. It wasn't that bad.

They even had fireworks. What a sight! It looked like something you'd put on a tourist card.

And then, the next day, we packed up.

As we were getting on the boat to get back to Tagami, I was greeted by Nanaki and Ruki.

"Hello," Ruki said. "You are Josh-sama, right?"

"Yes," I said. "I am Josh-sama, but feel free to just call me 'Josh'."

Ruki nodded. "I just came to say that it was a pleasure to meet you."

"It was a pleasure to meet you as well."

"That Fuyu... She has a lot of potential. But... Do you mind if I express my wisdom?"

"No, not at all."

"I believe Fuyu is wasting all of her potential on that Yuuki boy."

"Yeah, I know she is."

"Ah, so you noticed it, too?"

"How could I not?"

"You have a point... Well, we hope to see you again."

"As do I."

As the boat left the dock, we all waved back to the residents of Rokushiki.

Then it started raining. But it was sunny. The clouds were just right above us.

"Sunny rain," Shiro said. "Mystifying."

Sunny rain.

How beautiful...

I smiled as the rain continued to fall.

Nothing could bring me down now.

Everything was going fine.

Fuyu is healthy.

I've got great friends.

And I'm getting married in just a little more than a month.

Everything is perfect.


	9. Union In October

Me and Shiro were sitting on a bench in the park.

Shiro yawned on my shoulder. "This is how it should be," she said. "Peaceful."

"Mmhmm," I agreed with her.

The breeze was so soft. The ground was like a painting. Everything was so colorful.

Red. Orange. Yellow.

The colors of autumn are beautiful.  
Love is beautiful.

"You're beautiful," I told Shiro.

"I know," she said.

Then we stayed there in silence for a few minutes.

"Shiro?"

...No response.

"Shiro?"

I looked over. She had fallen asleep on my shoulder. I patted her head.

"You keep sleeping, honey."

I inhaled the Autumn air.  
Even the air itself was peaceful.

"Keep sleeping."

Then I yawned.

And then I fell asleep, too.

-=============-

And then I woke up. Just a dream. But that didn't change the fact that I still had Shiro...

Hey, where is-?

"You're finally up!" Shiro exclaimed as she rolled over onto me.

I giggled. "Yeah," I said. "I'm up."

"Do you know what month it is?"

"October?"

"Yep! And do you know what that means?"

I blanked out for a sec. I don't remember everything in the morning.

Then I remembered.

I launched up to sit with Shiro.

"This is our month!" I exclaimed.

Shiro nodded.

I hugged her tightly.

This is it.

This is the month where we get married.

"I love you, Shiro."

"I love you too, Josh."  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
The morning was looking nice so far. The sun streamlined through the branches and few leaves of the trees. And best of all...

Yuuki was walking with me, holding my hand.

"So did you have a good night?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said. "What about you?"

"I had a good night, too." I turned my head to look at him, abd he turned his head to look at me.

We smiled at each other.

"I'm so glad you love me," I said.

"And I'm glad you love me." He smiled.

I noticed something. "Are you worried about something?"

"What? No."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. I'm sure."

...

"Okay." I went back to looking at the trees.

There's something worrying him. And I'll figure it out.

But what could it be?

——————————

The breeze was now getting stronger. It was slowly turning from an autumn breeze to a winter wind. But that's ok.

After all, just being around Shiro warms me up.

"What are ya looking at?" She asked me.

"Huh?" I hadn't realized that I zoned out. "Oh, uh, nothing. Just kinda spaced out for a second."

She gave me a smile, then went back to looking at her stomach.

It was clear that the baby was set to be born soon. Not soon as in any minute, or not even this month. But soon.

"I can feel it kicking," Shiro said. "Reminds me of when I was pregnant with Fuyu."

_Speaking of Fuyu... Where is she?_ I thought. Fuyu had already left the house during the morning.

Oh, right. She's got that thing with Yuuki.

What? I wouldn't even consider it a relationship. Yet.

First, Yuuki needs to choose if he loves Fuyu or Asa more. I think he knows that, too.

But still, Fuyu wasn't back yet. _I don't think she's in trouble... But it'd still be a good idea to look for her._

I got up. "Where're you going?" Shiro asked me.

"I'm gonna go see where Fuyu is, she's been gone for quite a while."

"I'm sure she's just out with Yuuki."

"That could be it, but still..."

Shiro grabbed my hand and pulled me back next to her on the park bench.

"Relax, I'm sure she's fine. And besides, I want you to stay here."

I smiled. "If you insist."

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

"Come on, Yuuki!" Fuyu said. "Hurry up!"

"I'm coming!" I called to her. The hike up Mt. Ookami is an easy one, but also a long one. I was running to catch up with Fuyu.

When we reached the temple, Fuyu brought me inside, and to a mirror.

"Check this out." She said.

Then she just... Jumped through the mirror. Like it was a portal of some kind.

I put one hand into the mirror, to check if I was just dreaming. Then another hand grabbed mine and pulled me in.

"You could've just walked through it, you know," Fuyu said.

I rolled my eyes. She gave me a smile, then started leading me to somewhere.

I was gazing around. It was like this place was a whole nother world. And, for all I knew, it probably was.

Then we stopped in front of a one-story house.

"Is this where you live?" I asked.

Fuyu nodded. "Yep!"

"It's peaceful here."

"That's why me and Mom have stayed here."

I was so amazed by how quiet it was. Then, not long after, Fuyu said,

"Yuuki... Can I ask you something?"

"Sure. Ask away."

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

The leaves were crinkling under our feet as we made our way up the mountain.

"It's nice out today." I said.

"Yeah, it is." Josh said. "We better enjoy the sun while we can."

I didn't even realize it, but I started staring at him.

I still couldn't believe it.

I finally found somebody to spend the rest of time with. Somebody who gave up their own mortality, just to be with me. I loved it.

I'm loving everything right now.

But still, I'll never love anyone, or anything, more than Josh.

"I can't wait for our wedding." I said.

"Me neither," he replied. "But we do have to wait. For now."

———————————

Step, step.  
_Ring._  
Step, step, step, step, step, step, step, step, step, step.  
_Ring._

This would be the second-to-last rehearsal before me and Asa would have to do this for real. The wedding would be happening in, what? A few weeks?

The last rehearsal would be the day before.

_Ring._

"You're doing good at this, Yuuki," Asa said.

"Thanks." I replied.

"I can't believe the wedding is happening soon. In fact, I can't believe it's already October! This year flew by."

"Every year flies by."

_Ring._

"But not as fast as this one," Asa replied.

"I wonder why that is."

"I have a few ideas."

"Is that so."

_Ring._

"Go on, I'm listening," I said.

"Okay. Well, like I said, I have few ideas. First idea is that this year flew by because it was a fun one."

_Ring._

"The second idea is that it's because I made a lot of new friends." She continued.

I just nodded my head.

"But, the reason I think is most likely is that this year flew by because..."

_Ring._

"...Because you said you love me." She blushed.

"That could definitely be a possibility."

We were now walking up the trail to Mt. Ookami.

"Did your year fly by?" She asked.

"...No, I wouldn't say so."

"Oh."

"Just another year."

Though I must admit, a lot has happened this year.

First off, there's two gods of Tagami now. A lot of people get into debate about how Fuyu should technically be included in the count, but anybody who knows Josh, Shiro, or Fuyu know that Fuyu is still in training.

Josh technically is, too, but he's learned a lot very quickly. Enough to call him an actual god of Tagami.

Secondly, there's Asa and Fuyu. The fact that I'm in love with both of them made this-

_Ring._

-year go from slow, to fast, and back again. Confusing, to say the least.

Third, there's-

"Look out." I said, pulling Asa back.

"Look out? What for?"

Then a deer came racing through the trees. If Asa would've kept going, she would've been trampled for sure.

"Oh. Thank you, Yuuki!" She said, hugging me.

"No problem." I said, continuing the walk.

What was I saying...?

Oh, right. Um, what was the third thing? I can't remember.

It was important, though. But I guess I'll just have to wait to remember it.

_Ring._

Step, step, step, step...

"The breeze is nice today." Asa said.

"Yep."

_Ring._

"The leaves look quite beautiful."

"They do."

"Yeah. Oh!" Asa took a leaf off from the top of her head.

_Ring._

"Look at that," she said. "A colored cherry blossom leaf."

"Those are quite rare, even in autumn."

"Yeah..."

_Ring._

"Here, have it." She said.

"No thanks."

"Are you sure? These don't fall often."

"I'm sure."

"Then I'll keep it. For you."

_For you._

...

_Ring._

————————————

Many of the town's people were outside.

Some to go out and buy stuff, others to enjoy the weather, others to see their friends or family.

But most were out for the autumn harvest.

"Apples and pumpkins." Josh said. "Those are the only crops I've ever thought of when it comes to this season. But now I see that there's a lot more."

"There is indeed." I replied. "But apples and pumpkins are the most popular among the crops, since they're a seasonal tradition in many countries."

"Like America."

"Yes, like America."

"I gotta admit, my favorite snack of fall- er, autumn, is apple crisp."

"Apple crisp?"

"Yeah, you know, apple crisp."

I just sat there.

"Don't tell me you haven't had apple crisp before."

"I might've, and it's just been a while. Then again, I might've never had it. I know what is, yeah."

He grabbed my hand. "Then follow me. We're getting some apple crisp."

Then he ran with me into the town.

"I'm sure there's a store around here somewhere that sells them... Aha! Found one!" Then he ran into a store.

When he returned, he had a tray with a cover on it.

"Come on, let's go home so you can try some of this."

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

"Pumpkin pie isn't too bad, I like it." I said, responding to Josh's question.

"Then I'm sure you'll love this." He said.

"I might."

"I'm sure you will." He said with a smile. That smile that always warmed my heart.

And made me happy.

I giggled a bit. As I was giggling, I felt a spoon go into my mouth.

"Oops, did I forget to say 'say ahh'?" He said.

I blushed. "You don't have to spoon-feed me."

"Why not?"

"I'm capable of feeding myself."

"You looked cute though."

"Stop making me blush."

"Stop being Shiro then."

I just smiled, and started eating the apple crisp with him.

Josh is the best person I've met.

And I bet I'm the best person he's met, too.

I never thought perfection could exist. And Josh certainly isn't perfect. Neither am I.

But we are perfect for each other.

Even after we were done eating, I was still blushing.

He inhaled, then exhaled. "Apples and pumpkins," he said. "Both make the best desserts."

————————————

"You're kidding, right?"

"No. I am in love with two girls."

"Yeah, and you're dating both?"

"Yes."

"That's gonna turn out well." Josh said sarcastically.

I was talking to him in the Ookami temple.

"My father did it, and he's fine."

"You're basing your fate on your father's story?!?"

"Yes, it would seem fair to do so."

"How so?"

"I am his son, after all."

He just gave me some silence, then he said, "They say the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree. This time, I'm wondering if the apple even came off the branch yet."

Ha. Ha.

"You really don't think it's a good idea?"

"Could I make it more obvious?"

I didn't know how to reply to that.

"Whatever, good luck, then." He started leaving, then paused. "You're gonna need it." Then left.

*************************

Even though the next rehearsal wasn't until a couple weeks from now, I could still hear the bell ringing in my ear.

_Ring._  
_Ring._  
_Ring._

Every ten steps.

_Ring._

Every person I pass by on the street.

_A ringing next to me._

Every time I think if those bells.

_Asa._

It was a chain event, I just couldn't stop thinking about Asa. Even when I'm with Fuyu.

"You there?" Fuyu asked.

We were walking in the park, and most of the trees were becoming nearly bare.

I, being myself, zoned out in thought.

"What?" I replied.

"I said, 'do you have any plans this weekend?'"

I pretended to think about my schedule. I didn't have anything going on this weekend, but...

"Yeah, I've got a few things."

"Must be busy, being a child of the Towada family."

"Must be busy being the child of a god."

"Surprisingly, it isn't."

"Really?"

"Yeah, after all, Josh is here to do most of the god stuff I did before. Once I'm finished training, I'm sure I'll have a lot on my plate."

"Yeah, probably."

We walked in silence for a bit.

The sun didn't help at all. It's warmth was no match for the breeze going through all of Tagami.

Though the breeze was light, it was still enough.

"I'm glad I'm with you." Fuyu said. "I've always felt... Weird when I was around you before. But when you kissed me in August, that made the weird feeling go away. Instead, it brought a new one. Pure love."

Then she grabbed my hand. I felt like letting go, but, why would I? It felt right to keep holding on. So that's what I'll do.

Keep holding on.

_Because that's what pure love is._

————————————

Tomorrow.

...

Tomorrow.

I still couldn't believe it.

Tomorrow would change everything....

...Right?

I threw myself back into the wall.

_Keep dreaming, Isa._

_But I have to keep hoping._

_Hoping for what?_

_Hoping that this'll work._

_That is, if you can even cross the boundary._

Fuck, right. The boundary. Completely forgot about it. Or I didn't. I don't know, I'm confusing myself.

Now my head hurts.

Anyways, that boundary has been up for so long. You'd think it would've came down by now, but no. Surprisingly, they have somehow kept it up.

Interesting.

It makes me wonder if they'll be as attentive during their wedding.

_Ok, so let's assume you_ can _cross the boundary. Then what?_

_I put my plan into place._

_And if it works?_

_Then it works._

_You're assuming that. You're also assuming that Josh is just gonna forgive you._

_I know he won't._

_So what? When he denies your request for forgiveness?_

_Then I kill him._

_Creepy._

_Hey, you're my conscience. You were thinking it, too._

_Fair point._

I just realized I was talking to myself.

Wow, ok. I'm an idiot.

Anyways.

Tomorrow will be "the wedding we've all been waiting for". I've been waiting for it, too. But not for the same reason as everyone else.

I looked at Tagami, which wasn't too far from where I was. But that boundary would keep me out.

Surely there's a way around it.

I'll find a way around it. For sure.

...

I gotta stop getting my hopes up.

I thought about Josh. I was angry at him, he's just shutting me out when I'm trying to walk in.

But while I may be angry at him, thinking about him still makes my heart skip a beat.

It's not my fault. It's not. He wasn't supposed to arrive that early. He should've known better...

Right?

Who am I kidding? It is my f-

_No it's not._

_Now you agree with me on something?_

_Josh should've pretended like nothing happened. What happens in your free time stays in your free time._

_But that doesn't change that I cheated on him._

_..._

_Hello? You gonna help me out here?_

_..._

Now my own conscience was giving me the silent treatment.

I really have a way of unintentionally pushing people out, huh?

———————————

I took each step like it was my last.

I was extremely nervous.

Today should be relaxing. It should be happy. But instead, I've never felt so anxious in my life.

Everybody I knew, then some I didn't know, were here. Why? It's tradition. It's what happens.

Well, at least during a wedding.

Oh, did I forget to mention that today is the wedding? Well there. I told you now.

Me and Shiro didn't get dressed up for this. Truth be told, we should've. But Shiro wanted to keep her look. And who's gonna argue with a god over how they look?

_Deep breaths._

I know that Shiro is going to say _I do_ , just like I will. But still, I've got butterflies in my stomach.

Step up on the little stage littered with colored leaves.

Then wait.

Then there she was. Walking down the aisle.

Nothing could go wrong now.

Right.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

After the whole ceremony, there was this Tagami tradition we followed.

First, we got on Shirou.

Who, by the way, hasn't been very talkative recently. I know why, as well. And this wedding isn't gonna make it easier for him.

Then, we rode up the trail to Mount Ookami.

Yuuki was walking on one side of the sidewalk, while Asa was walking on the other. Yuuki rang a bell every ten steps he took. Asa rang a bell whenever she came across somebody.

As we were riding up the trail, I took in the scenery. Everything looked like it was straight out of a painting.

My heart was beating fast. I still couldn't believe it.

And I know this isn't a dream. It can't be.

But it still felt like a dream. I guess that's normal.

Here I was. Riding on a wolf, holding hands with the love of my life.

I wish this day could last forever. But it can't. And that's fine. Because after all, I'll still have Shiro.

When we reached the top of Mount Ookami, I felt so out of place. This was a culture I was introduced to ten months ago, and I still didn't know what happens next.

Makami opened the temple doors.

Yuuki and Asa walked in front of us, and kneeled down.

They said something about the guiding of souls, I wasn't really paying attention. I guess I could always look back at _Bridal June_ to remind myself what's said but eh.

And then me and Shiro walked into the temple.

I've walked through those doors many times, but this time, it felt like I was walking through them for the first time ever.

Makami directed us to the center of the temple, which had been decorated. Set? Decorated? I don't know. It was different. But a special different. Does that make sense? Anyways...

We sat down on the rug. At this point, my heart was racing at the speed of light. All I could think was, _I can't believe this is happening._

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Makami had said the words I have been saying for years upon years now. It was so weird. I wasn't used to it. I looked over at Josh, who was blushing the color of a tomato. It made me smile.

And then, Makami asked the big question.

"Do you, Shiro of Tagami, promise to keep this spiritual bond between yourself and Josh of Tagami?"

I never thought I'd be in this situation before.

"I do."

Josh smiled a bit. Which, in return, made me smile right back. It's like a spell. A spell I never want to break.

"And do you, Josh of Tagami, promise to keep this spiritual bond between yourself and Shiro of Tagami?"

"I do."

Josh blushed again.

Makami nodded. "Then I shall bless you both with a blessing that will bond your souls now, and until the end of time."

Makami raised her hand, then the room lit up. After the blinding light had disappeared, I could already feel my spirit bonded with Josh's. It was so much stronger than just... "Love".

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

My body felt weird. In a good way. It was shooting euphoria through my body. But, it didn't feel like my body was making it. It felt like it was coming from Shiro herself... I-I don't really know how to explain it.

But it worked. That's all I could say.

To think, nearly two months ago, I had met Isa.

Then nearly a year ago from now, she had broke my heart and made my world dark.

Then I walked into Tagami, and Shiro lit it right up. Who would've guessed? I never planned to stay in Tagami, at least not until the end of time. Just a few years.

But here I was. I grabbed Shiro's hand. Then I pulled her to me, and picked her up in arms. Then we kissed, and then we walked through those temple doors.

The outside air had felt different. I looked around. This would be my new home now.

I still couldn't believe it.

"C'mon, Josh," Shiro said. "Let's go." Then she took me to a path that led down the mountain.

———————————

The soil was soft. I could feel it. Josh's hand was also soft. We were walking down the trail that led from the top of Mt. Ookami to Tagami. Me and him have walked this trail many times before, but never like this. It was different this time. And I liked that.

Suddenly, I felt a water drop on my hand. Was it raining? I looked up at the sky. No, there were barely any clouds in the sky. So what could it have been? I looked over at Josh, who had tears coming out of his eyes.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Nothing," he said.

"Then why are you crying?"

"...I'm just... So happy." He chuckled a bit. He wiped away his tears, but it didn't do much, since they kept coming. "My entire life had gone downhill for years and years. Then a few years ago, it became an emotional rollercoaster. One that never stopped. And the entire time, it had been up to the people I loved to decide whether it went up or down. As you saw with Isa, that didn't get me far. But then you came along." He was smiling and his cheeks were blushing. "You were the only one that never let it down, you've kept my rollercoaster going up and up. And now, that'll never end. It's just all so... unreal. I feel like I'm in a dream. A dream in which I never want to wake up." Then he looked at me, with tears all over his face, smiling. "Thank you so much, Shiro."

I wiped away his tears with my hand. "No, thank you, Josh." I said. "You came around when I needed somebody like you the most. As soon as I first met you, I knew you'd be a part of my life, whether it's be big or small."

We kept walking, looking at each other, smiling.

"I love you." We said in sync.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

We were halfway down the trail.

...

I had never been able to put my life into words, it was just all too painful for me to try to. But Shiro, just by being next to me, had helped. I never thought I'd open up to anybody like that.

My life was different now.

My world was different now.

And I don't want to change a thing.

"Shiro..." I said.

...? No response. She was right next to me. Maybe she hadn't heard me.

"Shiro..." I said a bit louder.

...Okay, what's going on? Am I going deaf? I turned to look at Shiro...

...Who was barely even walking.

"Shiro? You ok?"

"Y-yeah, I'm fine, j-just a bit tire-"

Then she collapsed.

"Shiro!"

I crouched down to pick her up, then I noticed something. There was a chopstick in her arm.

...Wait a fucking second...

Then a chopstick just barely missed my head. Immediately, I took out my staff, and jumped towards the direction from which the chopstick came. Of course, there was a person there. I couldn't make out who it was, they were moving too fast.

More and more chopsticks flew by me. After a while, I had just had it. I grabbed a chopstick from the ground, and threw it at the person. I missed, but I kept trying. Eventually, I got their hand pinned to a tree. The chopstick gun fell to the ground.

And guess who it was.

"Of course it's you," I said. "How did I not guess?"

Isa was hanging from a tree with a chopstick impaled through her hand. She rolled her eyes.

"How the hell did you get here?" I asked.

"Through the entrance."

"Past the barrier?"

"What barrier? You've been too busy getting all lovey-dovey with that... 'Shiro'."

...Whoops.

"Could you let me down and kick me out now?" She said.

"Nah, I'll keep you there."

"What?!"

"You're lucky I don't kill you right here, right now. Be grateful." Then I walked away, and mumbled under my breath, "bitch."

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

I had brought Shiro down the rest of the trail. She was still passed out. Luckily, there were a few shrines nearby that could get us home. I could hear all the people cheering as I walked past them. But I was also starting to tune them out. Right now, I was just focused on Shiro.

"Hang in there." I said.

——————————

Shiro had woke up in the middle of the night. She seemed so dazed and out of it.

"Ugh..." She said. "W-what happened? Where are we?"

"Don't worry," I said. "We're back home. You passed out after Isa shot you with that special chopstick gun."

"I-Isa? She tried to kill me?"

"She tried to kill me, too."

"Are you alright?"

"Thankfully, yes. If I wasn't, I don't think we would be here right now."

"...Thank you."

"No thanks needed, I couldn't just let you die."

She giggled. "I guess that's true."

The breeze and moonlight came in through the window. Shiro looked even more beautiful with the light of the moon behind her. It looked like something straight out of a fairy tale. So mystifying.

I played with her hair a bit. It was soft. It felt comfortable. After a bit, Shiro took my hand and placed it on her cheek.

"You're cold." She said.

"And you're warm."

She smiled, and hugged my arm.

We didn't need a blessing to keep us together. But it added to our love. It made it much stronger.

...

_This is it. This is my life. I finally found somebody to share my life with. Forever. Much longer than any ordinary relationship. Because unlike most others, we won't die for a long time. We've got each other, forever. And I wouldn't change a thing._

_I don't want to change a thing._

_Everything is perfect._

_Reality is perfect._

_My life..._

_...Is finally perfect._

"You're tearing up again." Shiro stated.

I didn't say anything, I just hugged her. She didn't say anything in return, just hugged me back.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Surprisingly, the sharing of blessings went quite well. I never doubted that Asa would say yes. I only doubted that I would say yes, with confidence.

But in the end, it worked. We're a bit closer, I can feel it.

I stared at the night sky out the window.

It had been a good day. But one question had raced through my mind since the sharing of blessings.

_How am I gonna break it to Fuyu?_


	10. Unnatural December

The wind blew stronger than autumn. I had to put a hand in front of my face just to keep my eyes open.

"How are you able to stand this?" I asked Shiro.

"When you start living with it for hundreds of years, you get used to it. Trust me."

I doubted it, but I kept walking. Pushing against the wind. I looked up at the sky. Snow was falling left and right. But snow, I was used to snow. It felt nice. Each snowflake landing on me.

It was peaceful.

Looking around, I could see snow on trees that were either dead, or were full of leaves. Snow covered the ground and created a blanket across the land.

And then next to me, was Shiro. Who was walking like this was any other day, while I looked like some force was pushing against me. Her white hair was blending in with the snow.

But the best part was that she was Shiro.

She was the light of my life. She was the reason I could get through life. She was mine. She was my everything.

You call it cheesy, I call it my feelings.

Back to the wind. It was strong. Surprisingly strong. There were times where I thought I'd actually fly up in the air like an umbrella. Shiro must've noticed that, because after looking at me struggle, she grabbed my hand.

I know we're married. But still, every time she touches me, I blush bright red. My face warms up.

Well, just being around Shiro warms me up.

"Thanks for making sure I don't blow away," I said.

She giggled. "No problem."

I know that it's been a month since we got married, but still. Everything felt like a dream...

But surely by now, I would've woke up, right? Or is this some dream I just keep returning to?

I've questioned reality before. Wondering if everything is just a dream. Not because I think the universe is make-believe or anything, I just like to know when I'm in a dream.

I'm into what's called "lucid dreaming". Where you can control your dreams. By knowing your dreaming.

But another question comes to my mind. If this were a lucid dream, would I want to change anything?

Ask me a couple of years ago and I would've said yes. But now, I just go with what happens.

And doing exactly that...

Brought me to heartbreak.

So then I took a change from the normal schedule, and met Shiro.

Amazing.

But now, I wouldn't change a single thing in my life. Not again.

—————————————

Fuyu had sat up when she heard me say that. "Ok, I'm listening..."

I still wasn't sure how to put it into words. I mean, Fuyu and I had attractions toward each other for a while. Now I had to break that.

It's not easy.

I didn't want to be too harsh. I didn't want Fuyu to even remember it. Just hear it, understand, and then move on with life.

I knew that wasn't going to happen no matter what I do.

So I just said what came to mind.

"I know we've had feelings for each other for a while, and that's great. I liked that. But, over time, I guess those feelings just kind of..."

"Changed?"

"Yeah..."

"I thought I was the only one."

This came as a shock to me. Fuyu was good at hiding her emotions, but I didn't know she was that good.

"Is that so?"

"I didn't want to tell you. You seemed so happy."

"...Is it bad I think that's relief?"

"Trust me, I'm thinking the same thing."

We sat in silence for a bit.

"Well, we'll still be friends, right?" Fuyu asked.

"Of course." I replied.

The snow fell gently around us. This was a Winter's bliss...

..And you know, it's strange. When I broke up with Fuyu, I expected my heart to feel broken. I prepared for it.

But instead, it just felt like I had let go of something I lost connection to.

It felt nice. Is that bad?

"So I guess that's it," she said. "I guess we're back to just being friends."

"Yeah," I said. "It's not bad."

"No, it's not."

\----------------------

It's horrible.

I swore I'd find my love in Tagami. But now, it felt like it was somewhere else.

So why stay in Tagami?

I mean, sure. It's my home and all that. And I'm supposed to be a god for it, but...

I'm different from other gods. My family is different from other gods. Because we had something no other gods had.

We had the need for affection. The need to know there's somebody with us. The need to trust somebody. The need for love.

Without it, everything just felt empty.

Josh felt it more strongly than any of us. Why? Because he was human.

Sure, he's a god now. But it still didn't change much. And not many people seem to realize it.

Not even Josh himself.

—————————————

Masaki was explaining to me about this new year's tradition that him and his friends used to do every year.

"Why'd you stop doing it?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We grew out of it."

"So why are you doing it again this year?"

"Well, this hasn't been an ordinary year, so why celebrate it in an ordinary way?"

"Good point."

"I just can't imagine if we'll be able to get everything right, it has been a long time."

"How long exactly?"

"We kinda stopped around the time Yuuki was born."

I can imagine why. A baby must be a lot of responsibility, and takes up a lot of time. Stressful.

But still, thinking about taking care of a baby with Shiro made me smile.

"So I'm guessing you'll need extra help this time?" I asked.

"If you don't mind." He replied.

"I'd love to. It sounds exciting."

The most exciting thing I've ever done for New Year's was drink sparkling grape juice at midnight while everybody is cheering for the new year's downstairs. While I was just up in my room, glad to finally be alone for a few hours.

Those were the days.

The horrible days.

...

Fuck, I'm thinking of my family again.

"You ok?" Masaki asked.

"I'm fine, just some memories came up." I replied. I looked over at Shiro, who was chatting up a storm with Yuki.

I have to clear my head somehow. Shiro is my family. Better family than my old one. Much better.

Shiro actually listened.

Shiro actually cares.

Shiro knows me.

Shiro can tell when something is wrong.

And I love her.

All those make her very different from my old family.

They never listened.

They never cared.

They didn't know a lot about me.

They could never tell when something was wrong.

So why should I have loved them?

...

Now my head hurts...

...

I need to lay down.

——————————————

"What?" Josh asked.

"Yeah..." Was all I said.

He sat in silence for a bit.

"That was quick." He said. "Didn't think Yuuki would break up with you that quickly... You okay?"

"Yeah."

"You don't look like it."

_Obviously not, I can't stay here. My life isn't here._ Was what I wanted to say. But my mind wouldn't let the words come out of my mouth.

"I've just got a lot on my mind... Unrelated to Yuuki."

Wasn't a complete lie.

"Do you want to talk about what's on your mind?" Josh asked.

"No, not really."

He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. Then replied, "Ok then, so long as you're fine."

"Thank you."

"Ok, last question."

"Okay?"

"Why did you come to me about your breakup with Yuuki?"

"Because you've been through a breakup, you know what it feels like."

"So has Shiro."

"Yes, but in my opinion, yours was worse."

"I wouldn't say so."

"How so?"

"Isa was a bitch. Plain and simple. She never loved me- or rather, she might've at one point, then lost it and never told me. She kept me around as a backup plan. Somebody to lean on, but not in the good way."

"And how is that different from Mom's story?"

"Because Masaki actually loved your mother. He didn't keep her around as a backup. Sure, he cheated on her. But he had his reasoning. In the end, he had to choose. And he let his heart choose." Josh seemed to daze out. "When it comes to love, always follow your heart."

"Who'd you learn that from?"

"Nobody, it's just personal experience."

"So I should follow my heart..."

"Yes."

"My heart says..." _My heart says I need to explore this world and find that longing I'm yearning for._ "...Yuuki isn't the one."

"Then there you go."

"Thanks for talking with me, Josh. I feel a bit better."

"Glad I could help."

——————————————

Have I ever mentioned that I love snow?

Probably, but I'll say it again. It's amazing. A bunch of unique little frozen pieces of rain fall from the sky to recreate a scene so beautiful that nobody can describe it perfectly.

A blanket of snow covering the ground, glittering off whatever light there is.

It's something that happens only on one occasion: winter. It's not year round.

As I was helping bring supplies for the new year's party up Mt. Ookami, I looked at the snow that covered the ground. It got thicker and thicker as you went up the mountain.

The snow reminded me of a lot of things.

It reminded me of Shiro. It's beautiful, just like her. It's something I always look forward to seeing. Just like her.

It reminded me of my old family. I thought back on all those snowball fights I had. The snow angels I made. The forts I could never make.

That's probably the only thing I hate about snow. It reminds me of my old family.

And for some reason, it reminds me of Isa.

At the moment I realize this, I get a sudden heartache. _No._ I thought to myself. _I'm over her._ Because I am. I am over her...

So why did it hurt my heart to think about her? Everytime I thought about this, I felt like crying. Why?

Why?

Isa cheated on me, then broke up with me. I should be over her.

Besides, I'm with Shiro now. And I love Shiro...

...

But I guess...

...

I guess I still have some feelings for Isa.

We met in December, we bonded in January, she confessed in February, she left in April, came back in May, changed everything in August...

Isa.

Isa wasn't my first crush. But... She was my first relationship. I guess she'll always have a place in my heart.

But still, Shiro holds a bigger space. And I like that. Shiro won't break my heart.

I sighed.

_The least I can do for Isa is forgive her._

That is, assuming she got down from that tree. If she hasn't, she must be dead by now. Not because of hunger or anything. Infection.

An open wound like that would- ok I'm nerding out again. Sorry.

After we brought everything up the mountain, Masaki thanked me.

"No, thank you." I replied.

"For what?"

"For everything. You were the first person to welcome me here. And you've been helping me ever since."

"That's just me."

"Not a lot of people are like that."

"Not a lot of people have gone through what I've gone through."

"You really think your adventures changed you?"

"I know they have. Have your adventures changed you?"

I turned my gaze to the view of Tagami.

"Nope, I'm still the hopeless case I once was." Me and him both laughed. "But seriously, yeah. I've learned a lot since I came here. I've grown a lot. I'd say-"

"Hold that thought, Yuki is calling me."

"Oh, see ya."

"See ya." Then Masaki ran to Yuki. I looked up at the temple.

...

————————————

My hand still hurt.

Wouldn't yours hurt too, if it got impaled with a chopstick gun? I was wandering around aimlessly in the outskirts of Tagami. There wasn't a boundary anymore. I guess Josh doesn't see me as a threat. I could walk into Tagami anytime. But I didn't.

"Looking for some new way to attempt to murder me?" Josh's voice startled me.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Look, I'm not here with hostile intentions."

...

"I wanted to say I'm sorry."

I jumped a bit. I turned around to face him. "What?"

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?"

"For everything I said to you. In the heat of that event, I just... Couldn't handle seeing you."

...

"I should've been more forgiving."

I started to tear up. "I'm sorry, too." I took a deep breath. "I never should've done what I did. We were happy. We had everything. And then I went and cheated on you." I felt like I was going to break down. "Then things didn't work out with Jake, so I came here to... Well, as you put it, 'use you as a plan b'. I was stupid for thinking it would work. Jack told me you were in a relationship. I don't know what possessed me to think you'd choose me over her. And then I saw how happy you were, and I couldn't handle it." I looked up at him. "I'm sorry for being such a fucking idiot. Can you forgive me? Ever?"

"Sure, Isa. I forgive you."

"Can we start over? Pretend like none of this happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want to remember the mistakes I've made, and I don't want you to remember that we were in a relationship. Just... Start our story over. Like we're strangers."

"You're crazy... But if it's what you want." He reached out his hand. "Hello, I'm Josh of Tagami. I'm one of the local gods here."

This felt so strange. But at the same time, it was a relief. I shook his hand. "I'm Isa Latem. I just moved here."

"Well I hope you enjoy Tagami."

"I think I will."

"Good to hear. If you ever need anything, me and my wife live up by the temple." Then he pointed to the top of the mountain.

"I'll remember that."

"Be seeing you." Then he left.

"See ya."

...

I erased any memory of our times before that moment.

————————————

It was nearly nine. The sun would set soon. Then Masaki, Yuki, and everybody else would be on the other side of the mirror, waiting for us.

Shiro had actually got dressed up for this.

Speaking of Shiro, she had been mentioning how the baby has been kicking a lot more. Maybe it was almost time?

I was excited. And I could tell Shiro was, too.

Fuyu was coming, too. If this were a normal occasion, we would've had her stay home. But I convinced Shiro to let her come. New Year's only comes... Well, once a year.

When the clock hit nine, I was still cleaning some things up.

"You coming?" Shiro asked.

"Tell them to continue without me. I just gotta finish this up."

"Okay." Then Shiro and Fuyu walked out the door. I put all the books on the shelf.

_Harvest December_  
_Boundaries In January_  
_Gifting February_  
_Lovely March_  
_Typhoon In April_  
_Combat in May_  
_Bridal June_  
_Theological July_  
_Festive August_  
_Maternal September_  
_Disunion In October_  
_Parting November_  
_Perfect December_

All of Masaki's adventures. To think, I was living my own.

As I was putting the books away, I noticed something...

The ring. That ring I got for Isa...

Didn't I leave that in America? I guess not.

After that, I got up, left the house, and closed the doors. Then I walked to the portal. I looked at my reflection in this mirror.

I was wearing an attire similar to what Shiro always wears. With a staff on my back. My hair was becoming less blond and more white. I had wolf-like ears on my head.

I had come a long way. I certainly am not the same person I was a year ago.

I smiled at this, then walked through the mirror. The same flash of light.

And then a blast of warm air.

The air of the temple smelled different. Now, it smelled like burning wax, candles to be exact. It also smelled like, well, food.

"There you are," Masaki said.

Every friend I met in Tagami was sitting at a table. I took a seat next to Shiro.

"Thanks for waiting," I said. "But you could've started without me."

"Actually, no we couldn't." Masaki replied.

"Why not?"

"I figured we'd start the celebration off with a few words from our new god."

"Words? About what?"

"Like, how has your time in Tagami been?"

_How has my time in Tagami been..._

I thought about this for a few seconds.

"Well..." I started. "When I first entered Tagami, it was to find a way to get rid of the stress going on in my life. I just wanted a break from everything. Little did I know," I chuckled. "I'd end up facing everything I was trying to escape in the face. But I'm fine with it. My time in Tagami has made up for it. I was welcomed in January, a month where I also fell in love with my wife. In February, things got restless. But that was fine. In March, I saw the true power of love. In April, I experienced wonder after wonder." I looked up at the ceiling. "Another thing I'd never change. In May, determination was in the air. Whether it be from me, Shiro, or Isa, it didn't matter. It was there. I started planning my life out in June. This July was a natural one, too natural even. In August, I saw the festive spirits of a new place I've never been to before, and even remembered things I completely forgot about." Then I started blushing. "October was when I'd start living in union with my Shiro. And now, December is here. And everything feels so unnatural. In a good way." I looked down at the glass of wine in my hand. "I've learned a lot of new things from my time here. And I could recite them... but ah, fuck it. Cheers!"

"Cheers!" Everybody echoed. Then we all clinked our glasses together.

—————————————

Midnight had passed. It was now the new year. Another January.

Shiro had fallen asleep on my shoulder halfway through the celebration.

I breathed in. Though most of the air smelled like scented wax, you could still smell the crisp night air. It was peaceful.

The party was starting to die down. I guess that's good. I'm getting tired myself. Just when I was about to get up, Shiro starts moving.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said. "Just some aches."

"Okay," I replied.

I expected she just needed to get comfortable and fall back asleep, but that wasn't the case. She kept moving.

"Shiro, what's wrong?"

And then the answer I've been waiting to hear.

"The baby's coming."

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

I stood outside of the house, nervous. For whatever reason. Mom has had children before this one; why was I scared?

Just me being me, I guess.

"Relax," Yuuki said. "I'm sure everything is going just fine."

"I know, I really do." I replied. "I just can't help myself."

_This has happened before._

Nothing to do but wait.

Another thing that was on my mind was my thought about leaving Tagami. It still felt right. I just wasn't sure when I would go. Better yet, where I would go.

It was something I realized I never thought through.

It should've been something I thought about in the first place. But me being me, of course it wasn't.

Just jumping into thoughts. I sighed.

"This is actually pretty exciting." Yuuki said. I just nodded back.

Me and Yuuki didn't have that weird feeling around each other anymore. And ever since we broke up, we just acted like we never fell in love. It works.

And then the doors opened. Josh and Mom stood in the doorway, with Mom holding the baby.

Then Josh said, "Say hello to the new god of Tagami... Sakurada!"


	11. Unnatural December

The wind blew stronger than autumn. I had to put a hand in front of my face just to keep my eyes open.

"How are you able to stand this?" I asked Shiro.

"When you start living with it for hundreds of years, you get used to it. Trust me."

I doubted it, but I kept walking. Pushing against the wind. I looked up at the sky. Snow was falling left and right. But snow, I was used to snow. It felt nice. Each snowflake landing on me.

It was peaceful.

Looking around, I could see snow on trees that were either dead, or were full of leaves. Snow covered the ground and created a blanket across the land.

And then next to me, was Shiro. Who was walking like this was any other day, while I looked like some force was pushing against me. Her white hair was blending in with the snow.

But the best part was that she was Shiro.

She was the light of my life. She was the reason I could get through life. She was mine. She was my everything.

You call it cheesy, I call it my feelings.

Back to the wind. It was strong. Surprisingly strong. There were times where I thought I'd actually fly up in the air like an umbrella. Shiro must've noticed that, because after looking at me struggle, she grabbed my hand.

I know we're married. But still, every time she touches me, I blush bright red. My face warms up.

Well, just being around Shiro warms me up.

"Thanks for making sure I don't blow away," I said.

She giggled. "No problem."

I know that it's been a month since we got married, but still. Everything felt like a dream...

But surely by now, I would've woke up, right? Or is this some dream I just keep returning to?

I've questioned reality before. Wondering if everything is just a dream. Not because I think the universe is make-believe or anything, I just like to know when I'm in a dream.

I'm into what's called "lucid dreaming". Where you can control your dreams. By knowing your dreaming.

But another question comes to my mind. If this were a lucid dream, would I want to change anything?

Ask me a couple of years ago and I would've said yes. But now, I just go with what happens.

And doing exactly that...

Brought me to heartbreak.

So then I took a change from the normal schedule, and met Shiro.

Amazing.

But now, I wouldn't change a single thing in my life. Not again.

—————————————

Fuyu had sat up when she heard me say that. "Ok, I'm listening..."

I still wasn't sure how to put it into words. I mean, Fuyu and I had attractions toward each other for a while. Now I had to break that.

It's not easy.

I didn't want to be too harsh. I didn't want Fuyu to even remember it. Just hear it, understand, and then move on with life.

I knew that wasn't going to happen no matter what I do.

So I just said what came to mind.

"I know we've had feelings for each other for a while, and that's great. I liked that. But, over time, I guess those feelings just kind of..."

"Changed?"

"Yeah..."

"I thought I was the only one."

This came as a shock to me. Fuyu was good at hiding her emotions, but I didn't know she was that good.

"Is that so?"

"I didn't want to tell you. You seemed so happy."

"...Is it bad I think that's relief?"

"Trust me, I'm thinking the same thing."

We sat in silence for a bit.

"Well, we'll still be friends, right?" Fuyu asked.

"Of course." I replied.

The snow fell gently around us. This was a Winter's bliss...

..And you know, it's strange. When I broke up with Fuyu, I expected my heart to feel broken. I prepared for it.

But instead, it just felt like I had let go of something I lost connection to.

It felt nice. Is that bad?

"So I guess that's it," she said. "I guess we're back to just being friends."

"Yeah," I said. "It's not bad."

"No, it's not."

\----------------------

It's horrible.

I swore I'd find my love in Tagami. But now, it felt like it was somewhere else.

So why stay in Tagami?

I mean, sure. It's my home and all that. And I'm supposed to be a god for it, but...

I'm different from other gods. My family is different from other gods. Because we had something no other gods had.

We had the need for affection. The need to know there's somebody with us. The need to trust somebody. The need for love.

Without it, everything just felt empty.

Josh felt it more strongly than any of us. Why? Because he was human.

Sure, he's a god now. But it still didn't change much. And not many people seem to realize it.

Not even Josh himself.

—————————————

Masaki was explaining to me about this new year's tradition that him and his friends used to do every year.

"Why'd you stop doing it?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We grew out of it."

"So why are you doing it again this year?"

"Well, this hasn't been an ordinary year, so why celebrate it in an ordinary way?"

"Good point."

"I just can't imagine if we'll be able to get everything right, it has been a long time."

"How long exactly?"

"We kinda stopped around the time Yuuki was born."

I can imagine why. A baby must be a lot of responsibility, and takes up a lot of time. Stressful.

But still, thinking about taking care of a baby with Shiro made me smile.

"So I'm guessing you'll need extra help this time?" I asked.

"If you don't mind." He replied.

"I'd love to. It sounds exciting."

The most exciting thing I've ever done for New Year's was drink sparkling grape juice at midnight while everybody is cheering for the new year's downstairs. While I was just up in my room, glad to finally be alone for a few hours.

Those were the days.

The horrible days.

...

Fuck, I'm thinking of my family again.

"You ok?" Masaki asked.

"I'm fine, just some memories came up." I replied. I looked over at Shiro, who was chatting up a storm with Yuki.

I have to clear my head somehow. Shiro is my family. Better family than my old one. Much better.

Shiro actually listened.

Shiro actually cares.

Shiro knows me.

Shiro can tell when something is wrong.

And I love her.

All those make her very different from my old family.

They never listened.

They never cared.

They didn't know a lot about me.

They could never tell when something was wrong.

So why should I have loved them?

...

Now my head hurts...

...

I need to lay down.

——————————————

"What?" Josh asked.

"Yeah..." Was all I said.

He sat in silence for a bit.

"That was quick." He said. "Didn't think Yuuki would break up with you that quickly... You okay?"

"Yeah."

"You don't look like it."

 _Obviously not, I can't stay here. My life isn't here._ Was what I wanted to say. But my mind wouldn't let the words come out of my mouth.

"I've just got a lot on my mind... Unrelated to Yuuki."

Wasn't a complete lie.

"Do you want to talk about what's on your mind?" Josh asked.

"No, not really."

He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. Then replied, "Ok then, so long as you're fine."

"Thank you."

"Ok, last question."

"Okay?"

"Why did you come to me about your breakup with Yuuki?"

"Because you've been through a breakup, you know what it feels like."

"So has Shiro."

"Yes, but in my opinion, yours was worse."

"I wouldn't say so."

"How so?"

"Isa was a bitch. Plain and simple. She never loved me- or rather, she might've at one point, then lost it and never told me. She kept me around as a backup plan. Somebody to lean on, but not in the good way."

"And how is that different from Mom's story?"

"Because Masaki actually loved your mother. He didn't keep her around as a backup. Sure, he cheated on her. But he had his reasoning. In the end, he had to choose. And he let his heart choose." Josh seemed to daze out. "When it comes to love, always follow your heart."

"Who'd you learn that from?"

"Nobody, it's just personal experience."

"So I should follow my heart..."

"Yes."

"My heart says..." _My heart says I need to explore this world and find that longing I'm yearning for._ "...Yuuki isn't the one."

"Then there you go."

"Thanks for talking with me, Josh. I feel a bit better."

"Glad I could help."

——————————————

Have I ever mentioned that I love snow?

Probably, but I'll say it again. It's amazing. A bunch of unique little frozen pieces of rain fall from the sky to recreate a scene so beautiful that nobody can describe it perfectly.

A blanket of snow covering the ground, glittering off whatever light there is.

It's something that happens only on one occasion: winter. It's not year round.

As I was helping bring supplies for the new year's party up Mt. Ookami, I looked at the snow that covered the ground. It got thicker and thicker as you went up the mountain.

The snow reminded me of a lot of things.

It reminded me of Shiro. It's beautiful, just like her. It's something I always look forward to seeing. Just like her.

It reminded me of my old family. I thought back on all those snowball fights I had. The snow angels I made. The forts I could never make.

That's probably the only thing I hate about snow. It reminds me of my old family.

And for some reason, it reminds me of Isa.

At the moment I realize this, I get a sudden heartache. _No._ I thought to myself. _I'm over her._ Because I am. I am over her...

So why did it hurt my heart to think about her? Everytime I thought about this, I felt like crying. Why?

Why?

Isa cheated on me, then broke up with me. I should be over her.

Besides, I'm with Shiro now. And I love Shiro...

...

But I guess...

...

I guess I still have some feelings for Isa.

We met in December, we bonded in January, she confessed in February, she left in April, came back in May, changed everything in August...

Isa.

Isa wasn't my first crush. But... She was my first relationship. I guess she'll always have a place in my heart.

But still, Shiro holds a bigger space. And I like that. Shiro won't break my heart.

I sighed.

_The least I can do for Isa is forgive her._

That is, assuming she got down from that tree. If she hasn't, she must be dead by now. Not because of hunger or anything. Infection.

An open wound like that would- ok I'm nerding out again. Sorry.

After we brought everything up the mountain, Masaki thanked me.

"No, thank you." I replied.

"For what?"

"For everything. You were the first person to welcome me here. And you've been helping me ever since."

"That's just me."

"Not a lot of people are like that."

"Not a lot of people have gone through what I've gone through."

"You really think your adventures changed you?"

"I know they have. Have your adventures changed you?"

I turned my gaze to the view of Tagami.

"Nope, I'm still the hopeless case I once was." Me and him both laughed. "But seriously, yeah. I've learned a lot since I came here. I've grown a lot. I'd say-"

"Hold that thought, Yuki is calling me."

"Oh, see ya."

"See ya." Then Masaki ran to Yuki. I looked up at the temple.

...

————————————

My hand still hurt.

Wouldn't yours hurt too, if it got impaled with a chopstick gun? I was wandering around aimlessly in the outskirts of Tagami. There wasn't a boundary anymore. I guess Josh doesn't see me as a threat. I could walk into Tagami anytime. But I didn't.

"Looking for some new way to attempt to murder me?" Josh's voice startled me.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Look, I'm not here with hostile intentions."

...

"I wanted to say I'm sorry."

I jumped a bit. I turned around to face him. "What?"

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry? For what?"

"For everything I said to you. In the heat of that event, I just... Couldn't handle seeing you."

...

"I should've been more forgiving."

I started to tear up. "I'm sorry, too." I took a deep breath. "I never should've done what I did. We were happy. We had everything. And then I went and cheated on you." I felt like I was going to break down. "Then things didn't work out with Jake, so I came here to... Well, as you put it, 'use you as a plan b'. I was stupid for thinking it would work. Jack told me you were in a relationship. I don't know what possessed me to think you'd choose me over her. And then I saw how happy you were, and I couldn't handle it." I looked up at him. "I'm sorry for being such a fucking idiot. Can you forgive me? Ever?"

"Sure, Isa. I forgive you."

"Can we start over? Pretend like none of this happened?"

"What do you mean?"

"I don't want to remember the mistakes I've made, and I don't want you to remember that we were in a relationship. Just... Start our story over. Like we're strangers."

"You're crazy... But if it's what you want." He reached out his hand. "Hello, I'm Josh of Tagami. I'm one of the local gods here."

This felt so strange. But at the same time, it was a relief. I shook his hand. "I'm Isa Latem. I just moved here."

"Well I hope you enjoy Tagami."

"I think I will."

"Good to hear. If you ever need anything, me and my wife live up by the temple." Then he pointed to the top of the mountain.

"I'll remember that."

"Be seeing you." Then he left.

"See ya."

...

I erased any memory of our times before that moment.

————————————

It was nearly nine. The sun would set soon. Then Masaki, Yuki, and everybody else would be on the other side of the mirror, waiting for us.

Shiro had actually got dressed up for this.

Speaking of Shiro, she had been mentioning how the baby has been kicking a lot more. Maybe it was almost time?

I was excited. And I could tell Shiro was, too.

Fuyu was coming, too. If this were a normal occasion, we would've had her stay home. But I convinced Shiro to let her come. New Year's only comes... Well, once a year.

When the clock hit nine, I was still cleaning some things up.

"You coming?" Shiro asked.

"Tell them to continue without me. I just gotta finish this up."

"Okay." Then Shiro and Fuyu walked out the door. I put all the books on the shelf.

 _Harvest December_  
_Boundaries In January_  
_Gifting February_  
_Lovely March_  
_Typhoon In April_  
_Combat in May_  
_Bridal June_  
_Theological July_  
_Festive August_  
_Maternal September_  
_Disunion In October_  
_Parting November_  
_Perfect December_

All of Masaki's adventures. To think, I was living my own.

As I was putting the books away, I noticed something...

The ring. That ring I got for Isa...

Didn't I leave that in America? I guess not.

After that, I got up, left the house, and closed the doors. Then I walked to the portal. I looked at my reflection in this mirror.

I was wearing an attire similar to what Shiro always wears. With a staff on my back. My hair was becoming less blond and more white. I had wolf-like ears on my head.

I had come a long way. I certainly am not the same person I was a year ago.

I smiled at this, then walked through the mirror. The same flash of light.

And then a blast of warm air.

The air of the temple smelled different. Now, it smelled like burning wax, candles to be exact. It also smelled like, well, food.

"There you are," Masaki said.

Every friend I met in Tagami was sitting at a table. I took a seat next to Shiro.

"Thanks for waiting," I said. "But you could've started without me."

"Actually, no we couldn't." Masaki replied.

"Why not?"

"I figured we'd start the celebration off with a few words from our new god."

"Words? About what?"

"Like, how has your time in Tagami been?"

_How has my time in Tagami been..._

I thought about this for a few seconds.

"Well..." I started. "When I first entered Tagami, it was to find a way to get rid of the stress going on in my life. I just wanted a break from everything. Little did I know," I chuckled. "I'd end up facing everything I was trying to escape in the face. But I'm fine with it. My time in Tagami has made up for it. I was welcomed in January, a month where I also fell in love with my wife. In February, things got restless. But that was fine. In March, I saw the true power of love. In April, I experienced wonder after wonder." I looked up at the ceiling. "Another thing I'd never change. In May, determination was in the air. Whether it be from me, Shiro, or Isa, it didn't matter. It was there. I started planning my life out in June. This July was a natural one, too natural even. In August, I saw the festive spirits of a new place I've never been to before, and even remembered things I completely forgot about." Then I started blushing. "October was when I'd start living in union with my Shiro. And now, December is here. And everything feels so unnatural. In a good way." I looked down at the glass of wine in my hand. "I've learned a lot of new things from my time here. And I could recite them... but ah, fuck it. Cheers!"

"Cheers!" Everybody echoed. Then we all clinked our glasses together.

—————————————

Midnight had passed. It was now the new year. Another January.

Shiro had fallen asleep on my shoulder halfway through the celebration.

I breathed in. Though most of the air smelled like scented wax, you could still smell the crisp night air. It was peaceful.

The party was starting to die down. I guess that's good. I'm getting tired myself. Just when I was about to get up, Shiro starts moving.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said. "Just some aches."

"Okay," I replied.

I expected she just needed to get comfortable and fall back asleep, but that wasn't the case. She kept moving.

"Shiro, what's wrong?"

And then the answer I've been waiting to hear.

"The baby's coming."

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

I stood outside of the house, nervous. For whatever reason. Mom has had children before this one; why was I scared?

Just me being me, I guess.

"Relax," Yuuki said. "I'm sure everything is going just fine."

"I know, I really do." I replied. "I just can't help myself."

_This has happened before._

Nothing to do but wait.

Another thing that was on my mind was my thought about leaving Tagami. It still felt right. I just wasn't sure when I would go. Better yet, where I would go.

It was something I realized I never thought through.

It should've been something I thought about in the first place. But me being me, of course it wasn't.

Just jumping into thoughts. I sighed.

"This is actually pretty exciting." Yuuki said. I just nodded back.

Me and Yuuki didn't have that weird feeling around each other anymore. And ever since we broke up, we just acted like we never fell in love. It works.

And then the doors opened. Josh and Mom stood in the doorway, with Mom holding the baby.

Then Josh said, "Say hello to the new god of Tagami... Sakurada!"


	12. Season 1 Aftermath

There once was a snowflake.

It fell from the sky, and flew around. Carefree. It let the world show it it's path. But no matter what, it didn't dare touch the ground.

It stayed up. It stayed afloat. It was happy.

But as time went on, this snowflake could no longer let the world push it. It had to find it's own way.

It flew, unsure where to go. It followed a few other snowflakes, but always fell behind. It was always deserted.

And then that changed.

It found another to flow through the air with. They danced around, and danced some more. They both showed the world what a couple of snowflakes can do.

And then one day, the snowflake's partner left. To flow in another direction.

And so that what the snowflake did too.

It found a new direction. And eventually found its way to a small village.

What did it find here?

Another. Another one to flow through the wind with. But this one was different.

Because this one never steered off course. They were both happy.

But that's not the snowflake I want to talk about.

The snowflake I want to talk about landed straight on my nose.

I looked up. And little flecks of white were starting to fall. "It must be finally snowing," I said.

Shiro was about to say something, then sneezed. Her cute little sneeze.

"It's winter, so it makes sense." Sakurada said.

"Well," Masaki said. "Now it's _actually_ winter."

Sakurada just rolled her eyes.

I looked at Sakurada. Anybody could see that she had a bit of me in her looks, though for the most part, she looked like Shiro. Sakurada had the white hair Shiro has; but has blond streaks that are barely visible here and there. Her eyes are a golden-green. And her face was starting to look scarily close to Fuyu's.

Sakurada was definitely our child.

And I'm proud of that.

And that's the thing. She's Shiro's child, but she's also my child. She's bound to have some human in her. Even if it's just a bit. I'm not a "full" god yet.

And that scares me. She's partially human. She'll most likely be more vulnerable to things that gods wouldn't normally be vulnerable to.

Like, for example, feelings.

I don't know what Sakurada's future holds for her, but I know one thing: it won't be normal.

——————————

Isa was sitting next to a tree on the Mt. Ookami path. She was drawing something in a pad.

"What are ya doing?" I asked.

Isa jumped a bit. Then she looked behind her, at me.  "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"Why not? Your reaction is funny."

"...Just don't do it all the time."

I sat down next to Isa. I looked at what she was drawing in her pad.

She was drawing what I presume to be Tagami.

"Nice detail," I said.

"Thanks." Isa said.

Isa kept drawing for a few minutes, then put her pencil down.

"Josh," she said. "I've got a question for you."

"Ask away."

"If things went differently," she said. "If I never cheated on you, or you never met Shiro... Would you have taken me back?"

I didn't even have to think about that.

"I honestly don't know, Isa." I replied. "That breakup... That was possibly the worst day of my life. If it weren't for my friends, I don't think I could've gotten through it."

"Don't tell me you were actually considering-"

"I was." I interrupted her. "But thankfully, I didn't do it."

"Obviously." She said. "...Now I feel even worse."

"Don't."

"I can't believe I actually made you that sad." Then she looked at me. "I still do care about you."

"I know you do." I said. "I still care about you, too. As a friend. If you ever need anything or anybody to talk to, I'm here."

Isa was about to say something, but instead just closed her mouth and started tearing up.

Then she hugged me.

"Isa, you can't-"

"Just one last time."

I sighed. I hugged her back. Then my memories were shooting through my mind like bullets.

Everything about that moment triggered some memory.

Isa hugging me.

Me hugging her.

The smell of spring.

Isa's hair.

The air.

The leaves on the trees.

Everything.

It all came back in a second.

I pushed Isa away.

Then we just stared at each other for a bit.

That was the first time we've hugged in forever.

"I'm sorry. I really am." Isa said. "I know I've said it before, but..."

"Isa, I know. You've told me over and over."

Then more silence.

And then we both started tearing up.

—————————

Me and Shiro were laying down in the middle of the living room. It was quiet.

And quiet is good.

Because with all the noise that goes on, we all need to appreciate the world; realize it for what it really is.

We never really take time to notice the sounds of Earth.

So, yes. It's good to be quiet every now and then.

Also, I had a headache.

The autumn breeze was blowing in through the window.

"Oh yeah!" Shiro said. Then she looked over at me. "You know what next week is, right?"

"How could I forget?" I replied. "It was only the best day of my life."

Next week would be our... 8th. 8th anniversary.

I'm past the phase of everything feeling like a dream; I now knew for sure this is reality.

And everytime I remember that, I blush.

Not long after, Fuyu walked through the doors. "Mom? Dad? There's something I want to talk about..." Fuyu said.

"What is it?" Shiro asked.

We both sat up, ready to listen to what Fuyu had to say.

"I don't want to stay in Tagami." Fuyu said.

Me and Shiro looked at each other, then back at Fuyu.

"We know." Shiro and I said in unison.

"You knew? How?"

"All my children leave Tagami at one point," Shiro said. "I knew the case would be the same with you. But you have stayed longer than the others."

"Oh."

"Why not go to America?" I said. "You could go with Isa, she's leaving in a few days."

"America is too busy."

"That," I said matter-of-factly. "Depends on where you go in America."

"...That applies to any country."

"So?"

"...Alright, I'll try America." Fuyu said.

"Don't worry," Shiro said. "If you ever need anything, we're always here."

Way too true.

I'll be staying in Tagami for the rest of my life. I'm happy about that.

And whenever I think about that, there's a different emotion in me, rising up. But I just push it back down.

How long will that work for? Hopefully long.

Only time will tell.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I did writing it :)


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